Thursday, December 29, 2011

Sweetie the Panda Bear Makes the BBC’s Female Faces of the Year for 2011

Women everywhere, get offended! The BBC just heralded a panda as one of its 12 female Faces of the year 2011.

Really, what better way to end this year and ring in 2012 than to complain about the ridiculousness that is the global media?

Ok. Ok. As stories go, featuring Sweetie the panda as December’s most talked about woman is relatively harmless, especially compared to the nauseatingly long list of other media ridiculousness that ran rampant throughout papers and newsites the rest of the year.

Still, equating an animal to women worldwide (but more specifically U.S. Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, Brazilian President Dilma Rousseff and sister-of-the-princess Pippa Middleton, who all made the list right up there with Sweetie) serves as just one more example of how utterly insignificant the mainstream media has become.

With stories like that, it’s no wonder Fox News holds 2011’s top 13 most-watched cable news programs. There’s really not much else out there when it comes to traditional news outlets.

Here’s hoping that 2012 is filled with a lot more truth and common sense and a lot less propaganda and pointlessness.

Happy New Year!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Who Cares about Bill Maher’s Tim Tebow Tweets?

Judging by his observable behavior, Denver Broncos’ quarterback Tim Tebow seems like a decent guy.

And, by the same rule, so-called comedian Bill Maher seems like a pretty pointless person who doesn’t deserve the time of day.

Maher, the writer and star of the 2008 commentary “Religulous” – a movie that mocked religion in no uncertain terms – thrives on saying nasty things to cover up his intellectual and societal inadequacies. So it should come as absolutely no surprise that he doesn’t like Tim Tebow, an avowed Christian who isn’t ashamed of what he believes.

Considering the obnoxious, unethical and/or downright illegal behavior of so many other NFL stars – Terrell Owens, Michael Vick and even Brett Favre come to mind – it seems rather stupid to get so riled up by Tebow’s good behavior. But Bill Maher is a supremely stupid man, which is why he tweeted:

“Wow, Jesus just #@*! Tim Tebow bad! And on Xmas Eve! Somewhere… Satan is tebowing, saying to Hitler “Hey, Buffalo’s killing them”

Oh, and he didn't say #@*!. Self-censorship isn't something that Maher believes in.

Admittedly, the Broncos – which consist of more than just Tim Tebow, fyi – lost badly to the Buffalo Bills. And I’ll confess to cringing as I watched the score tick closer and closer to the humiliating 14-40 loss.

But guess what? Losses – even big ones – are part of life just like wins are. They don’t mean that Jesus hates Tim Tebow or that he isn’t exactly what he claimed to be.

Only a supremely stupid someone would try to think otherwise.

So here’s the bottom line on the issue: Bill Maher has made it his personal and professional purpose to prove himself pointless. And since he doesn’t have the power to affect our safety in any way, shape or form, it’s best just to ignore him altogether.

Maybe if we do, he’ll go away.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Anyone Can Get through Airport security with a Fake Boarding Pass but the TSA Takes the Cake

The TSA takes the cake.


Just ask Joe Maltese, whose mother-in-law packed a chocolate cake inside his suitcase, unbeknownst to him. But when he opened it up back home, he got a double surprise: Not only was the cake there, but there was also a decent third neatly sliced out of it.

Neither he, nor his wife, nor his mother-in-law claim responsibility for the missing chunk. And so Maltese contacted the TSA about it, since his luggage also featured a sticker marking that it had been checked.

Go figure, the TSA said it wasn’t their fault either. According to them, they meticulously went through their video feed, in which they saw nothing of any such cake violations.

And it’s not like we have any reason to distrust them other than that they’ve molested children, the elderly and everybody in between with their unprovoked patdowns; behaved completely unprofessional while handling traveler’s luggage and body scans (e.g. stealing stuff, purposely overlooking weed, writing sexually suggestive notes, etc.); picked prison-stay-inducing fights with colleagues, and wasted billions of taxpayer dollars.

Oh right, and they also don’t actually protect us from terrorists either.

Charles C. Mann recently met up with Bruce Schneier, an understandably constant critic of the TSA, who just happens to be a cryptographer and security technologist as well. Schneier is also the man who’s proven just how easy it is to get through airport security with a Photoshopped old boarding pass.

So “Has the nation simply wasted a trillion dollars protecting itself against terror?” Mann muses. His answer is far from satisfactory: “Mostly, but perhaps not entirely.”

Schneier addresses the problem with fairly flawless logic: The government should focus on nipping terrorist plots well before they reach the final phase. “That’s how the British caught the liquid bombers. They never got anywhere near the plane. That’s what you want – not catching them at the last minute as they try to board the flight.”

Put like that, it rather makes a girl wonder just how stupid our government really is.

“It’s infuriating,” Schneier sums it all up easily. “We’re spending billions upon billions of dollars doing this – and it is almost entirely pointless. Not only is it not done right, but even if it was… it would be the wrong thing to do.”

Considering the over bloated bureaucracy in control these days, that isn’t surprising at all.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

CAIR’s List of Questions for the 2012 Presidential Elections’ Candidate Field

It’s Christmas time, a time when normal Americans make lots and lots of lists: shopping lists, wish lists, to-do lists, lists of reasons to be thankful... You get the picture.

Liberals, on the other hand, need no such silly excuse as Christmas to make lists. They make lists all year round, and most of them are negative: lists of enemies to cross; lists of how exactly to aggravate business, slow the economy and dispirit workers; lists of ways to lie, cheat and steal without getting caught.

CAIR (the Council on American-Islamic Relations) is as liberal an organization as you can come by, if you define “liberal” as conniving, illogical and self-serving. So it’s no surprise that CAIR has a list of its own, one directed at the remaining GOP presidential nominees.

Here is its list of questions:

1. Racial and Religious Profiling/Homeland Security: A number of law enforcement agencies use race, ethnicity, national origin, or religion to identify and target individuals for heightened security attention even where there is no indication of wrongdoing. Do you feel relying on these types of characteristics is an effective tactic for protecting America? If not, then what methods do you endorse?

2. Transportation Security (No Fly List): Many Americans report being subject to additional screening when traveling by air or through U.S. borders as a result being incorrectly placed on one of several government watch lists. Would you provide an effective, expeditious means through which persons placed on a government watch list could have themselves removed?

3. Immigration Reform: Do you favor an immigration reform package that includes a path to legalization, an increase in family visas, and restrictions on the lengths of detentions? If not, what would you do differently?

4. International 1 (Afghanistan): What is your plan for bringing our troops home from Afghanistan without sacrificing American prestige and regional stability?

5. International 2 (Arab Spring): Popular protests and upheavals across the Middle East and North Africa have toppled authoritarian regimes and provided new hope that democracy will emerge in the region. How will your administration support this ongoing process of regional democratization?

6. Healthcare (Insurance Coverage): What is your solution to the twin problems of rising healthcare costs and large numbers of uninsured people?

7. Government Benefits (Social Security and Medicare): How would you oversee the administration of the nation’s Medicare and Social Security benefits?

8. Education: In December 2010, the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development (OCED) released a report that lists our nation’s high school students 25th among industrial world nations in math, 17th in science, and 14th in reading, while China’s Shanghai topped the charts. What is your plan for effectively educating our children and keeping our workforce internationally competitive?

9. Economic Empowerment 1 (National Debt): The United States lost its top-tier AAA credit rating from Standard & Poor’s in August 2011, and the national debt stands at $14.71 trillion. Many candidates have stated that they will eliminate the national debt and restore America’s credit rating without cutting government services to the neediest. How will you solve the debt crisis?

10. Economic Empowerment 2 (Revitalizing Economy): The current economic downturn, lack of trust in the financial market, and high unemployment rate has left far too many Americans struggling. What is your plan for the revitalizing the economy and reducing poverty in the United States?

11. Civil Liberties (Protecting Civil Liberties): Following the February 2011 reauthorization of the USA PATRIOT ACT, and revelations about the FBI and NYPD-CIA respectively carrying out domestic spying programs, civil liberties groups and Members of Congress continue to raise concerns over government intrusiveness into private life and the post 9/11 erosion of civil liberties. What measures will you implement to ensure the protection of the civil liberties enjoyed by Americans?

Personally, Number 2 is my favorite. And who says that CAIR isn't reasonable?

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

The Daily Caller Gives Us “Government Spending at Its Stupidest”

What would we do without amazing conservative websites like the Daily Caller, which gives us lists like “Top ten: Government spending at its stupidest?”

Thanks to them, we learn invaluable facts about what the government is doing with our hard-earned taxpayer money, like recklessly spending:

1. $130,987 for dragon robots: “We think the phrase ‘dragon robots’ sounds pretty cool. But when their purpose is to help develop preschoolers’ vocabulary, that’s when we get a little worried. The National Science Foundation will spend nearly $1 million over four years to determine if the dragon-shaped robot can enhance toddlers’ learning skills – because Elmo and Barney are just so 1990s.”

2. $175,587 for a study on the link between cocaine and the mating habits of quail: “The funding for this super-important scientific study is down from its 2010 level of $181,406. But we think the amount is ridiculous for research that proves what the film ‘Blow’ already did: that cocaine is linked to high-risk sexual activity.”

3. $96,000 on iPads for kindergartners: “One school district was awarded this grant to buy every kindergarten student the latest Apple gadget. These kids can’t add yet, but thanks to Uncle Same they’ll never need to.”

4. $147,138 to build a magic museum: “Maybe the wizards at the American Museum of Magic in Marshall, Mich., can make the federal deficit disappear. The grant was awarded to promote the “history of magic entertainment.”

5. $48,700 towards the Second Annual Hawaii Chocolate Festival: “These funds were awarded to promote Hawaii’s chocolate industry. The Aloha State is already full of sandy beaches, clear blue water, and sun. Why do they get all the good stuff/ (That’s the mayor of Hershey, Pennsylvania on Line 1.)”

6. $484,000 for a pizza restaurant: “Arlington, Texas has one more beer and pizza joint, thanks to this grant to a private developer. The groovy Mellow Mushroom, a national chain, is known for its hippie theme.”

7. $606,000 for a study about online dating: “Columbia University researchers received over a half-million dollars to study online dating. Maybe the Ivy League nerds who conducted this study should put down the lab coats and go to a bar – or at least the library.”

8. $55,660 on butter packaging: “Kriemhild Dairy Farms received this chunk of change to package their grass-fed cow butter. The funding isn’t the only thing that’s too big: The butter itself is 85 percent fat.”

9. $136,555 for teachers to retrace Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales in England: “This grant, awarded to teachers from Kent State and Eastern Illinois Universities, allowed Middle English fanatics to take the trip outlined in Canterbury Tales. We’re betting £10 that the tour guides just make up half of the landmarks.”

10. 764,825 for a study on how college students use cell phones and social media: “The National Science Foundation awarded the University of Notre Dame this grant to study the mobile and social media habits of college freshmen. We can tell you exactly how college freshmen use mobile phones and social media: for 3 a.m. texts and phone calls to that girl in American History. We could have saved the government a lot of money. Just ask us.”

Of course, considering the size of our national debt and deficit, those amounts might not really seem like that big of a deal. But you know what they say: A couple hundred thousand dollars here and a couple hundred thousand dollars there can really add up before you know it.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

If Women Ruled the World

According to some people, if women ruled the world, there would be no more war.

There would be no more power struggles, or rape or poverty or ill-educated children. Only songs sung to fluffy bunnies and friendly unicorns, while everyone wears lots of pink.

And yes, the notion is that ridiculous.

Despite PC notions of sex and gender, women are still human beings. And human beings have a nasty tendency to want what they want, when they want it and how they want it.

The only things that keep most people in check are the natural codes of ethics we’re created with and the legal ramifications of behaving badly. It might be tempting, after all, to lie, cheat, steal and abuse, but hopefully not enough to suffer the consequences.

But if men and women choose to ignore their consciences or consider the potential punishment insignificant, the gloves come off and the bad behavior starts.

For proof of that, look no further than any elementary school playground, where undisciplined little boys beat up on their weaker playmates and undisciplined little girls shun, pick on and trash talk their less pretty or graceful or well-to-do classmates. The motivations are the same; only the means of delivery differ, since each gender has its stereotypical tendencies and limitations.

Those limitations are why men, for better or worse, seem to dominate the history books. It’s simply easier for men to achieve widespread command than women, though there have been some prominent female rulers as well…

Like Queen Mary, who brutalized Protestants, and Queen Elizabeth, who persecuted Catholics in her turn. And like Queen Isabella, who is credited with starting the Spanish Inquisition, and Catherine the Great, who earned her name through her military might.

In other words, women are just as capable of instituting pain and destruction as men when they manage to achieve unlimited control. So gender has far less to do with it than power, which “tends to corrupt and absolute power [which] corrupts absolutely,” as Lord Acton wisely once said.

So when Hillary Clinton – a power-hungry, power-wielding woman – starts talking about promoting women as a means of bringing about peace and Barack Obama – a power-hungry, power-wielding man – starts signing executive orders to “support women as critical participants in preventing and resolving conflict,” consider both of them up to no good…

And their idea rather ridiculous.

Monday, December 19, 2011

“50 Facts about the U.S. Economy That Will Shock You”

According to The Economic Collapse, an economic blog that digs beneath the mainstream media’s “reporting” for the real relevant details, the U.S. economy is a lot worse off than President Obama and his cronies would have us believe.

“America is consuming far more wealth than it is producing and our debt is absolutely exploding. If we stay on this current path, an economic collapse is inevitable,” the site says. “If we do not educate the American people about how deathly ill the U.S. economy has become, then they will just keep falling for the same old lies that our politicians keep telling them.”

So, prepare yourselves for a bit of education. If you want to read the full list of 50 facts, click here. Otherwise, I’ve included ten of the most alarming below:

  • “If the number of Americans that ‘wanted jobs’ was the same today as it was back in 2007, the ‘official unemployment rate put out by the U.S. government would be up to 11 percent.”
  • “The average amount of time that a worker stays unemployed in the United States is now over 40 weeks.”
  • “There are fewer payroll jobs in the United States today than there were back in 2000 even though we have added 30 million extra people to the population since then.”
  • “The Federal Reserve recently announced that the total net worth of U.S. households declined by 4.1 percent in the 3rd quarter of 2011 alone.”
  • “The U.S. Postal Service [alone] has lost more than 5 billion dollars over the past year.”
  • “A higher percentage of Americans is living in extreme poverty (6.7 percent) than has ever been measured before.”
  • “Today, one out of every seven American is on food stamps and one out of every four American children is on food stamps.”
  • “Right now, spending by the federal government accounts for about 24 percent of GDP. Back in 2001, it accounted for just 18 percent.
  • “If Bill Gates gave every single penny of his fortune to the U.S. government, it would only cover the U.S. budget deficit for about 15 days.”
  • “The U.S. national debt has been increasing by an average of more than 4 billion dollars per day since the beginning of the Obama administration.”

Just a few things to think about while we’re all working out our New Year’s resolutions lists.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Tim Tebow Haters like Rabbi Joshua Hammerman Have Gone off the Deep End

I’ve been a Denver Broncos football fan since Super Bowl XXXII in 1998. (Which they won) And I’ve been loyal ever since, even rooting against my #2 team, the Steelers, in Super Bowl XL for beating the Broncos in the AFC Championship game that year.

Sadly, I don’t get to watch them all that much, largely because I don’t have cable. That and, living in Baltimore, I find myself frequently distracted from paying attention to my beloved Broncos, thanks to my intense annoyance with all things Ravens.

These days though, as difficult as it is for me to shut out the birds marking everything from billboards to coworkers’ conversations, it’s become even more difficult to ignore the Broncos, all thanks to the Tim Tebow insanity sweeping the country.

Commentary on Tim Tebow is everywhere, from the sports world to religious venues. And even in the former, opinions of him seem to spring from his Christianity more than his ability to play ball half the time.

Considering the downright nasty analysis he can get, it doesn’t seem too farfetched to say that it isn’t Tebow’s ability or inability to throw a ball that really has people in snits.

Take Rabbi Joshua Hammerman, who – if not for being a Jew – would probably get along great with President Obama’s old pal, Reverend Jeremiah Wright, who is known for his hateful words on just about every subject, including the 9/11 terrorist attacks. (Wright hates Jews, hence why he and Hammerman wouldn’t be friends.)

In his personal blog, Hammerman predicts that a Tebow Super Bowl victory could lead to “insane things, like burning mosques, bashing gays and indiscriminately banishing immigrants.” All because the Broncos quarterback is a conservative Christian.

Because conservative Christians are known for that kind of stuff? That notion makes as much sense as Hammerman’s defense that Tebow:

“…has done extraordinary things. His love for people is unbounded. His entire life’s work is also predicated on saving my soul for Jesus. He’s not alone in this. Tebow has been affiliated with the Southern Baptists, who spend millions to convert Jews, often deceptively… I personally don’t consider that exemplary behavior. Is it better than raping little boys? Absolutely. But is it admirable? I have issues with anyone determined to save my soul, be that person Christian or Jewish… My ideal person of faith is a pluralist, one who accepts the legitimacy of my faith. Tebow does not. I do not find that admirable.”

First of all, a religious pluralist is somebody who doesn’t really have a belief, only crack. Second of all, as far as I’m aware, Tim Tebow has never said anything even remotely anti-Semitic. And third of all, huh?

This seems a decent time to quote Proverbs 26:4 – a Jewish saying – and move on.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Islam Isn’t Nearly So Nice as CAIR Wants Us to Think

Islam is a problematic religion.

Sorry to say it yet again, but it’s just as true today as it was during the Fort Hood shooting of 2009, the 9/11 attacks of 2001 and the Twin Tower bombing in 1993.

It doesn’t matter that the Counsel of American Islamic Relations (CAIR) wants to portray Islam as “a faith that preaches peace, co-existence, justice, tolerance, love [and] compassion,” as the organization’s Ahmed Rehab says. Nor, for the sake of this particular discussion, does it matter that the majority of Muslims are just ordinary people trying to live out their lives.

There are still far too many extremely violent followers of Islam – of which we have ample proof – to deny that their religion plays a part in it. (For a verifiable list of JUST the Islamic group al Qaeda’s global contributions to violence, click here.)

Yet CAIR tries to numb us to all of that through propaganda like TLC’s “All American Muslim,” a reality show that follows five Muslim families through their everyday activities in America.

That’s all well and good, and in a free country like America, they have the right to create, produce and star in any such thing. But the public also has the right to know that there’s another side to Islam then what CAIR would have us believe.

This is the side that chains up, beats and even tortures young children in Pakistani Islamic seminaries to prepare them for fighting the infidels. This is the side that brutally attacks random pedestrians on Western streets while shouting ethnic slurs. And this is the side that wants Christians and Jews either dead or deprived of their God-given freedom.

It isn’t wrong or shameful or embarrassing to acknowledge that unfortunate reality.

When terrorists yell “Allah akbar” – clearly marking themselves as Islamists – right before they start attacking innocents, it’s only wrong and shameful and embarrassing to not acknowledge that Islam appeals to some people with really twisted world views.

We can treat Muslims both here in the U.S. and everywhere else with the respect they deserve as human beings and individuals. But we do not have to be dangerously stupid in ignoring Islam’s much more problematic side.

If anything, it might very well hurt somebody somewhere not to acknowledge it.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Michael Savage Offers $1 Million to Newt Gingrich to Drop out of Race

Popular conservative talk show host Michael Savage, stunned the news nation yesterday with an offer to presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich:

Get out of the race and he’ll give the former Speaker of the House $1 million; stay in and risk losing to Obama. In Savage’s own words, here’s why…

“The Republican presidential field has come down to two candidates who have a real chance of getting the nomination: Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney. While it’s true that Romney is not as strong a conservative as many would like him to be, the most pressing issue before America today is defeating Barack Obama. And that is something Newt Gingrich cannot do.”

Why not? Well, Savage’s reasons mainly come down to Gingrich not being as strong a conservative as he could be, which is funny considering how he flat-out admits that Romney isn’t, and yet he thinks the former Massachusetts governor can win it.

Can anybody say Romneycare?

Yet Savage doesn’t seem to be the only person who wants Mitt out at all cost. His fellow radio talk show host, Glenn Beck, says that he’d rather vote for Ron Paul as a third party candidate than Newt Gingrich on the Republican ticket.

Now I like Beck. And while I’ve never listened to Savage before, I can imagine that I might like him too considering the basic genre that he fits into. But on this issue, both of them are clearly nuts.

I don’t like Gingrich all that much myself. I think he’s a bit pompous, a bit duplicitous and definitely a bit scummy. But all of his faults pale in comparison to Obama, who is either one of the stupidest politician ever to hold office or one of the most evil, and definitely in the top 25 for being self-absorbed, narcissistic and belligerent.

So while, in my opinion, Newt is only marginally better than Mitt Romney, I’d still choose him over the worst U.S. President since Jimmy Carter anyday. And I think it’s fairly obvious that, with economic misery as high as it is, the majority of the country would agree with me.

As for a third party option? That practically guarantees another four years of Obama, so let’s not even go there.

If they know what’s good for their country, Savage and Beck can do us all a favor and just shut up already.

Monday, December 12, 2011

If I Ruled the Universe, the TSA, Obama Administration, UN and Robert Pattinson Would Be Outlawed

I’m always joking with my family and friends about how things would be “If I ruled the universe.”

This sometimes switches to “If I was empress of the world” or “If I ran Planet Earth” but, regardless, the gist is always the same: sanity and common decency would prevail.

If I ruled the universe, for example, women would not be able to wear leggings as pants, a fashion faux pas that shows every crack and crevice of their derrieres. Personally, I don’t care how many Buns of Steel workouts you do every week; I’d really rather not see that much of anybody without at least a formal introduction and a few dates.

If I ruled the universe, men wouldn’t talk about their college porno sprees or jaunts to the strip club in front of women they’ve just met, female colleagues or anybody who hasn’t signed a contract saying they actually want to hear about such things.

And if I ruled the universe, Robert Pattinson would not be a sex symbol. Ever. But that just goes without saying.

Just as necessary would be the removal of the TSA, who (temporarily) topped off their list of utter uselessness by removing an elderly woman’s back brace because they thought she “was wearing a money belt.” Forget my delicious dreamland: Please somebody tell me why they should exist in any universe when they’re so consistently incompetent?

Moving up the ladder, my universe wouldn’t include the Obama administration, which is chock full of more insane ideas than Barney Fife (without the charm). How else can you explain how it’s considering opening up an automated crossing between Mexico and the U.S. at a time when Mexican drug cartels are running amuck and illegal immigration is sapping us of both funds and safety?

And certainly neither last nor least, if I ruled the universe, the UN would be dismantled and fined for all it’s worth (which is or isn’t much, depending on the definition of the word “worth”). The power-mad organization is now looking into ways to impose a semi-global “climate debt” to respect “the rights of Mother Earth,” also known as a tax to line their corrupt pockets even further.

My universe wouldn’t stand for such corruption, stupidity and thoughtlessness. But since my universe quite clearly doesn’t exist, I suppose we’ll all just have to work at fixing this one up as best as we can.

Let’s get to it!

Friday, December 9, 2011

Washington Insiders Just Like to Hear Themselves Speak

Sometimes you have to wonder whether our elected officials actually hear themselves when they speak.

Then you realize that they live to hear the sound of their own voices, which is why they say as many dumb things as they do. After all, they can cram in a lot more them-time if they just babble like idiots.

Take Georgia’s Democrat Representative Hank Johnson, for example. He believes the whole kafuffle over the Fast and Furious gun running scheme “is another manufactured controversy by the second amendment, NRA Republican Tea Party movement.”

No matter that it was the Obama administration’s Attorney General Eric Holder who authorized it, purposely allowing Mexican drug cartels to purchase firearms and bring them across the border – allegedly to track them – resulting in a decent hundred or so deaths, including that of a U.S. border agent.

Nope! This is clearly the “second amendment, NRA Republican Tea Party” group’s fault for putting poor Attorney General Holder on the spot like this: not his own fault at all, clearly. Because perfectly innocent people usually have to explain the difference between lying and misleading Congress as pertaining to “your state of mind and whether or not you had the requisite intent to come up with something that would be considered perjury or a lie.”

Again, babbling like an idiot.

Or consider President Obama, who told a group of Hanukkah guests that he and his “never need an excuse for a good party.” Really, there was no reason to say that unless he enjoys hearing himself, since he’s already made that very apparent with his constant golfing trips and vacations and soirees.

I guess that’s just how Washington works though, both the capitol and the state, as evidenced by Representative Rick Larsen’s staffers tweeting about their drunken activities on the taxpayer’s dime, and referring to the congressman as “my idiot boss,” among other things.

As unprofessional as that was, it’s hard to disagree with the sentiment, considering Larsen’s voting record on issues such as abortion, national security and energy. My biggest issue with his staffers' tweets is simply this: They didn’t include nearly enough people in that description.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Global Warming “Deniers” Are “Endangering Humankind” but the Fort Hood Shooting Was Just “Workplace Violence”

This is how ridiculous we’ve become as a nation:

Our elected senators make mountains out of molehills concerning global warming, while our Defense Department makes molehills out of mountains concerning national security.

Oh right, and our legislators unwittingly sign laws allowing military personnel to engage in sodomy and bestiality.

This is how ridiculous we’ve become as a nation… almost as pathetic as Europe, which is on the verge of collapse and still can’t do anything but whine and rag on America. I didn’t hear a single one of them questioning Standard & Poor’s decision to downgrade the United States’ credit rating this year, but now that it’s threatening to do the same to Germany, well clearly “some American ratings agencies and fund managers” must be “working against the euro zone,” right?

As if they’re not doing a bang up job of destroying their joint economy all by themselves. Just like we’re doing to ourselves by electing the likes of California Senator Barbara Boxer, who recently had this to say on the non-issue of global warming:

“The message I have for climate deniers is this: You are endangering humankind. It is time for climate deniers to face reality, because the body of evidence is overwhelming and the world’s leading scientists agree.”

I assume she’s referring to the scientists who think that aliens from outer space might destroy Earth to save the universe from the ravages of global warming… who are forced to take administrative leave on charges of scientific misconduct for their research on polar bears… or deliberately hide data that don’t support the conclusions they want?

Those scientists? Or is she talking about 1973 Nobel Prize winner and physics genius Dr. Ivar Giaever, who resigned from the American Physical Society over its pro-global warming stance? Or maybe she means NASA, which recently showed that the earth is allowing far more heat into space than global warming hypists would have us believe.

Truth is, I doubt even Boxer knows what she’s talking about. She rarely does, after all.

Neither does our Department of Defense, at least when run by the Obama administration. That much is obvious when it wants to classify a blatant act of terrorism – like Major Nidal Hasan’s Fort Hood shooting – as “workplace violence.” What about the proof that he corresponded repeatedly with radical Islamic cleric Anwar al-Awlaki?

But clearly, that kind of solid proof doesn’t matter when people are so intent on being ridiculous. And let's face it: Under President Obama, that's exactly what we're becoming.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

They’re Spending Our Money on Penis Pumps

They’re spending our money on penis pumps.

And no, there’s no punchline to that statement. Though it is clearly a joke when $240 million of taxpayer money got spent on penis pumps for the elderly over the last 10 years.

That’s according to the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, who justify the expenditure since erectile dysfunction (ED) can “commonly occur in men in the Medicare age group.” The National Institutes of Health says that this can be caused by “diabetes, other endocrine abnormalities, vascular abnormalities, trauma, neurogenic, psychogenic, side effects of many medications, and other causes.”

I think that by “other causes” they mean “old age.”

Let’s get real: The older our bodies get, the less they work. And here’s another hard fact to face (or not): Erections aren’t some kind of indisputable right that need to be protected at all costs!

I’m very sorry if a 65-year-old man can no longer perform like he could when he was a young stud muffin of 25. But as sad as I’m sure that is, it shouldn’t be the U.S. government or U.S. taxpayer’s job to pump up his penis! Nor should I have to donate my money towards affording him or anybody else Viagra or implantable devices.

Here’s another thought: If we’re so concerned about the government getting out of everybody’s sex lives, why shouldn’t it apply to the financial side of things as well as the legal or even ethical?

People should pay for their own darn penis pumps for heaven’s sake! And if they can’t afford one, then tough luck. I’m sure they’ll live.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Black Activists Sue Democrat Party for History of Racism

The Democrat Party has long held itself up as the protector of equality and the avenger to those suffering from racism, sexism, genderism, classism, and just about every other “ism” out there (just as long as it doesn’t favor Republicans in any way, of course).

Anybody who understands history, however, knows that banner is far from true. After all, the KKK, Jim Crow laws and the destruction of the black family (through welfare and Lyndon B. Johnson’s so-called War on Poverty) all lie squarely on the Democrat Party’s shoulders.

So really, African Americans have every right to dislike the group.

That’s why Reverend Wayne Perryman, prominent black pastor and community activist, is suing Democrats, from Obama on down. Filed on September 12, 2011 in an official U.S. District Court, Perryman and his co-accusers claim that the party has never apologized for its racist policies dating from 1792 all the way to the present.

At first read, that all sounds like Democrats are finally getting what they deserve. Because, let’s face it, as a party and even on the individual level to a large degree – either through intentional malice or unacceptable ignorance – they’ve acted like abusive spouses towards blacks: saying nice things and giving nice gifts to cover over the bruises.

But just because the Democrat Party deserves to be publicly humiliated and stripped of its finances doesn’t mean that this is the right way to go about it.

First off, the charge of “racism” isn’t on the U.S. books. People can’t legally be prosecuted for disliking somebody based on their differences, nor should they be.

This is a free country, after all, and freedom means the right to think without fear of prosecution, even if those thoughts are completely unfounded. So even if the Democrat Party never does apologize for all of the rotten, hurtful, hateful, ridiculous things it has said over the course of its existence, it shouldn’t legally have to.

Only morally.

It also shouldn’t have to pay for crimes its ancestors committed a few centuries ago or even a few decades ago. Whatever happened to personal accountability?

Of course, the answer to that questions is this: The Democrats killed it. Which means they doubly deserve this taste of their own medicine.

But even so, make no mistake of the bigger picture: This is vigilante justice at play: not law and order. And, as such, it will probably cause more harm than good in the end.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Unemployment Rate Slides to 8.6% Even though Job Situation Didn’t Improve

Checking out the news – specifically the report that “job creation remained weak” last month, yet somehow “the unemployment rate slid to 8.6%” – has put me into a decidedly cranky mood this morning.

That kind of news makes me feel like I’m being lied to. Largely because I am. And so are you.

For that matter, we're also being patronized big time by the Obama administration, which obviously thinks it can play around with economic data enough to lull voters into a false enough sense of security so that we’ll vote Democrat next year.

Translation: Our elected president and his motley crew think we’re a bunch of idiots. Stated bluntly like that, it’s rather hard not to take offense.

Then there’s Herman Cain’s admission that he gave Ginger White money without his wife’s knowledge. That has me ticked off too.

Do I think that he cheated on his wife? No, I still don’t. I’m still as certain as I can be without flat-out proof that those other women were frauds, which makes this latest case unbelievably convenient for Cain’s opposition.

Yet even if my suspicions are correct and Ginger White was lying, it doesn’t change the fact that Cain made a major – and frankly, stupid – mistake that could very well cost him any chance of getting the nomination. If I was his wife, I’d be ticked.

Heck! If I was his supporter – which I am – I’d be ticked!

Though I don’t think I’d mind being wrong in this case, for better or worse, right or wrong, I can’t see Cain recovering from this latest attack.

And that makes me cranky.

Thank God It’s Friday.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Kim Kardashian, Katy Perry and Lindsay Lohan in Most Popular 2011 Search List

Yesterday I couldn’t help but shake my head in disgust at America – a country that I truly love – when I read about a convicted criminal’s extremely frivolous lawsuit.

Today, unfortunately, I find myself doing the same exact thing after reading Yahoo’s “2011 Year in Review.” Apparently, these were the Top 10 most searched for internet topics in 2011, in order:

1. iPhone
2. Casey Anthony
3. Kim Kardashian
4. Katy Perry
5. Jennifer Lopez
6. Lindsay Lohan
7. American Idol
8. Jennifer Aniston
9. Japan Earthquake
10. Osama bin Laden

Setting Apple mania aside, it’s a really sad day when shallow sluts like Kim Kardashian, pointless bimbos like Katy Perry and all-around train wrecks like Lindsay Lohan are deemed to be of such monumental interest.

While I actually do feel bad for Lindsay Lohan, who is throwing her life away to indulge in obviously very low self-esteem (I can’t bring myself to have any such pity for Kim Kardashian, who only got famous because she made a sex tape, and Katy Perry, who goes out of her way to portray herself and womankind as sexbots with the mental capacity of dandelions), I still have to ask:

Who cares?

Unfortunately, the answer is as obvious as it is unflattering. Mindless gossips care to know all the dirty details about Kim Kardashian’s ill-fated, publicity-driven marriage or Linday Lohan’s countless trips to court and rehab, just like self-made subservients are interested in Katy Perry’s latest cupie doll performance.

(And no, I’m not talking about clicking on a featured story about them every once in a while. I’m referring to actually searching for them.)

As Yahoo points out, “Breaking news stories don't always crack the Top 10: People don't have to search for details they can get in the news, and it's rare that a single term can stand for a complex news story.”

But even so, that’s no excuse for such universal interest in the illegal, immoral and uninspiring antics of such uninspiring and exceedingly immature individuals.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Criminal Files Lawsuit against Victims for Breach of “Oral Contract”

What in the world is this country coming to?

If Jesse Dimmick’s lawsuit is any indication, it isn’t going anything good.

As far as I can tell from the convoluted story delivered by ABC News’ Topeka, Kansas chapter, Dimmick was running away from the cops after allegedly beating a man to death. Stumbling upon the home of Jared and Lindsay Rowley, he figured it was the perfect hiding place and went for it.

Dimmick says he explained the situation to them and, agreeing to give them money if they hid him from the police. The Rowley’s say they only let him in because they knew he was armed and were afraid of what he would do if they said no.

One way or the other, Dimmick was eventually captured and the Rowley’s went on to sue him for intruding in their home and causing them emotional stress, which they believed was worth about $75,000.

So the now-convicted criminal followed suit and laid down his own charges:

“I, the defendant, asked the Rowleys to hide me because I feared for my life. I offered the Rowleys an unspecified amount of money which they agreed upon, therefore forging a legally binding oral contract.” For this, he wants $235,000.

In Dimmick’s defense, I’m really not sure which lawsuit is more absurd. Suing a criminal for emotional distress seems rather ridiculous, not to mention extravagantly opportunistic. Shades of Shylock, anybody?

Then again, believing that a fugitive’s oral contract is worth anything – much less $235,000 – legally speaking is equally insane. And both cases display a total lack of substance that’s rather appalling.

If this is really what America has come to – where both victims and criminals think they can milk the legal system for all it is and isn’t worth – then that’s beyond sad.

It’s pathetic.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Richmond Virginia Tea Party Slammed with Tax Audit for Protesting Unfair Treatment

“The power to tax is the power to destroy.”

I’ve used that quote, made by Chief Justice John Marshall in the Supreme Court case of McCulloch v. Maryland, before. But it’s one of those statements that never gets old, largely because it never become irrelevant or unimportant.

Let’s face it: Liberals don’t really care about saving the poor, the oppressed or the earth, causes which they claim they need our money to support. They just know that, by paying lip-service to those issues, they can get themselves elected so they can force us to pay for other things, including their trips to Europe, unethical legs up and cushy connections.

They also know they can curry favor and/or punish their opponents with the same tax system that ultimately pays their wages and benefits. And right now, the city of Richmond, Virginia stands out as a clear example of just how right Chief Justice Marshall really was.

Down there, the local chapter of the Tea Party movement had to pay $10,000 and meet countless regulations in order to stage three rallies. The payment and rules were all meted out and met according to the letter of the law.

Then along came the Occupy Wall Street movement and suddenly the city didn’t care to acknowledge those same fees and laws, much less enforce them. So after weeks of watching the protesters camp out, make a mess and cause disturbances on public property – all for free – the Richmond Tea Party had had enough, and demanded its money back.

Not surprisingly, the powers that be refused. A bit less predictably, they also slapped the Tea Party chapter with a tax audit for daring to question their authority.

Of course, Richmond Mayor Dwight Jones’ administration completely denies the allegations of favoritism. They’re “just completely unfounded,” city spokeswoman Tammy Hawley told Fox News.

As for the audit, “The Richmond Tea Party did not file any of the required… monthly returns during 2010 and had only filed January and February 2011 when this account was selected for audit review,” she said. To which the Richmond Tea Party fired back, saying it was legally and specifically exempted from the tax in question.

But here’s the thing: Even if it wasn’t – which it probably was, as this audit is so convenient for the opposition that it’s flat-out ludicrous – the whole situation illustrates just how much power the government has over us… and just how much trouble that means we’re really in.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Black Friday Sales Results Look Good but Might Not Hold Their Eggnog Well

After a hectic Black Friday filled with crazy deals and even crazier customers, the tallies are in.

CNBC reports: “sales rose an estimated 6.6 percent to a record $11.4 billion on Black Friday… while the traffic at stores rose 5.1 percent, according to ShopperTrak.”

To the untrained eye, those numbers might very well seem to signal the dawning of a new season of shopping and consumerism set to conquer this weak economy once and for all. CNBC is certainly quick to invest in that misconception, casually mentioning, “As usual on Black Friday, retailers used deep discounts… to lure shoppers [in],” as if nothing other than holiday cheer – and Obama, of course – influenced those hefty sales.

But the real reason behind this season is far less joyful.

The truth is that consumers are hurting, and retailers know it. Which is why they went out of their way to slash prices ridiculously low.

Best Buy, for example, had 42” LCD HDTVs for just under $200. J.C. Penney offered luggage sets for under $40 when they’re normally well over $100, and Wal-Mart featured HP laptops for $248.

Sorry to say, but those bargains aren’t normal, even for Black Friday. Neither is the fact that Target opened up on Thanksgiving instead of early the next day, or that Kohl’s made it a Black Friday weekend instead of a single morning.

These are all signs of a weak economy, no matter how much stores made. And they might even indicate weaker consumer spending as we continue into the Christmas shopping season: The mad dash for bargains could be a sign that holiday gift-givers are keeping themselves on tight leashes this year.

On the bright side for investors and consumers alike, as I said before, retailers know that consumers are hurting. So they’re playing it safe with especially great buys and deep discounts that will keep customers happy and probably even make companies a profit in the end.

Just don’t think that any of that is a sign the economy is finally turning. As Georgia business owner Bill Looman advertises in his van window, he’s “not hiring until Obama is gone.”

And neither is anybody else.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Occupy Wall Street Courageously – and Stupidly! – Plans to Occupy Black Friday

Say whatever you want about the Occupy Wall Street crowd (I certainly have) but there is one negative name that even I’ll be hard-pressed to slap on them this Black Friday.

There’s overwhelming proof to support claims that they’re lazy, ill-educated, irresponsible, greedy, spoiled brats. But if they really go through with their plans to protest “the businesses that are in the pockets of Wall Street” like they say they will, then cowards they ain’t.

Stupid, yes. Cowards, no.

Occupy Wall Streeters are apparently trying to encourage consumers to just say no to stores that are publicly traded this Black Friday. In other words, they think they have a shot of convincing people to boycott the likes of Target, Wal-Mart, Macy’s, J.C. Penney, Sears, Apple and so many other typical shopping spots that ultra bargain hunters literally kill to hit up the day after Thanksgiving.

Like I said: Stupid, yes. Cowards no.

Cowards wouldn’t put themselves in the middle of intimidating crowds of crazed shoppers looking for their $300 flat screen TVs, whatever-is-up-this-year Elmos and other assorted discounted goodies.

Though stupid people just might waste their time explaining on their website:

“Keep in mind that we are not occupying small businesses or hardworking people – we must make a distinction between the businesses that are in the pockets of Wall Street and the businesses that serve our local communities.

“We are NOT anti-capitalist. Just anti-crapitalist.”

Really though, when it comes down to it, they can call themselves whatever they want to. Come the morning after Thanksgiving, when they face off with hundreds of thousands of Black Friday shoppers, they’re going to be bleeding, broken and crying for their mamas.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

U.S. Politicians Think They’re Better Than Us

Here’s the problem with U.S. politicians: They genuinely don’t think they’re like us.

In their minds, they don’t come from “We the People.” In fact, in their minds, there is no “We the People” at all; it’s just "We the Washington insiders." And they like it like that.

That’s quite obvious considering how they’ve legislated everyday American life into knots and gnarls… while creating multiple loopholes for themselves to crawl out of.

Wildly unpopular and hazardous healthcare mandates? Congress doesn’t have to live or die with it.

Easy ways to make a buck through insider trading? Congress can; we can’t.

Heck, even when it comes to exceedingly cut and dry issues, government somehow manages to bypass its own laws. For instance, so far, has anybody seen any mention of former New Jersey Governor Jon Corzine going to jail for his heavy hand in the giant, money-laundering mess that has been MF Global for years now?

Yet catch any of us normal folks moving a toe – even unintentionally! – over legislator’s ridiculous lines and watch them throw every book they have at us.

For proof of that, just ask Carlos Rafael, a boat owner in the New Bedford, MA fishing community. He thought he struck it rich when his crew informed him they had accidentally caught an 881-pound bluefin tuna, which would go for a very pretty penny.

Considering the intricate netting of laws that govern every aspect of American life these days, it shouldn’t come as any surprise that fishermen have to have special permits for just about everything they do, including catching tuna.

But Rafael was ready for the exceedingly slim possibility of doing just that; he had been buying tuna permits for the last four years just in case. And as soon as he heard the good news, he immediately called the bluefin tuna hot line (Yes, government really does think of everything.) to report the catch just like he was supposed to.

Unfortunately, that was his big mistake, because apparently, the money he shelled out on those tuna permits only covered tuna caught with a rod and reel, not nets like his men used. And so the authorities were waiting to take the tuna away when his boat pulled up to shore.

For anybody who cares to know, that’s the problem with U.S. politicians.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Congress’ Super Committee Proves a Failure… No Big Surprise There

So much for Congress’ so-called Super Committee proving worthwhile.

For that matter, so much for Congress in general proving worthwhile.

Just as every sane, thoughtful person predicted, Democrat and Republican members of the recently formed and utterly pointless band of supposed problem solvers couldn’t agree on what to cut and what to save in the latest budget battle.

I’d love to blame the Democrats for this latest batch of insanity, but let’s face it: Republican Speaker of the House John Boehner helped create and forcibly pass the deal that created the Super Committee, insisting that it was the best possible plan available.

Yeah. Right. Sure. And magic feathers work outside of Disney cartoons.

It’s amazing that these people ever made it past middle school, much less obtained their bachelors and beyond.

Republican legislators assured their base months ago that they had rigged the debt debates so that cuts had to be made one way or the other. Yet they somehow didn’t foresee a problem in the fact that, if the Super Committee couldn’t play nice like big girls and boys, a decent chunk of that $1.2 trillion in proposed savings would be automatically taken from the military.

That was supposed to propel both sides into agreement, as if the average Democrat politician would have a problem with weakening our national defenses even more than we’ve already done.

I’d ask what Republicans were thinking, but that would assume they have the capability to think at all… and I’m not willing to take that for granted anymore.

Now we’re going to have to hear about their “talks” for the next month at least. Fox News writes:

“Failure by Congress’ debt-cutting Super Committee to recommend $1.2 trillion in savings by Wednesday is supposed to automatically trigger spending cuts in the same amount to accomplish that job.

“But the same legislators who concocted that budgetary booby trap just four months ago could end up spending the 2012 election year and beyond battling over defusing it.”

One more reason to look forward to 2013… when hopefully a number of these ridiculous people will be out of a job and out of our hair.

Friday, November 18, 2011

Occupy Wall Street Terrifies NYC School Children and Other Interesting News

Let’s do a crazy Friday blog, where I try to fit in everything newsworthy that’s caught my attention into one single (potentially) cohesive commentary.

First up is Occupy Wall Street, which went berserk on little kiddies yesterday. CBS reports how the “Tiny Tots, Some As Young As 4, [were] Overwhelmed By [the] Hostility, [and] Crush of Humanity.”

Of course, the protesters weren’t there specifically to frighten small children on their way to school. But they certainly didn’t object to scaring them either as the students and their parents braved “a gauntlet of… yelling and chanting – some kicking and screaming” so-called adults to get to their classes on the other side of the street.

The NYPD even had to help escort the children through while some protestors chanted, “follow those kids!” Why, I’m not sure, and considering the maladjusted behavior these people have displayed throughout their mini movement, I really don’t want to speculate.

99 of their fellow idiots also blocked traffic on the Brooklyn Bridge, prompting cops to arrest 275 people between there and Zuccotti Park. No wonder Karl Rove called them cowards when they interrupted his speech at Baltimore’s Johns Hopkins University, adding: “Do not be so arrogant and presumptive to think that you’re the only person who has a First Amendment right that needs to be heard.”

They are that “arrogant and presumptive” though, as well as disease ridden. St. Louis Health Director Pam Walker blames dating sites for increased STDs, but I think it could just as easily be blamed on the Occupy Wall Street movement.

Not so much for the fact that one in four American women apparently relies on medication for mental disorders. That, I think, lies squarely at the feet of a society that promotes women as victims twice-over: persuading them to be mere sexual outlets for men and then encouraging them to feel the victim when exactly that happens.

Thanks for that disturbing conundrum, liberals. It makes just as much sense as vilifying the rich, then allowing General Electric to pay little to no taxes for two years running.

That’s what happens though when you’re buddies with President Obama, who, by the way, has proven incapable of opening a door on two occasions now… twice as much as President Bush.

In all fairness, maybe that’s because First Lady Michelle won’t let him eat anything to keep his brain working properly. The woman is an annoying menace, and apparently the role model of Christopher and Mary Sultze, who were so concerned with childhood obesity that they starved their newborn baby for months to keep her from getting fat.

Welcome to the world of liberal thinking.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Money We Don’t Have and Things We Don’t Need

Here’s a pop quiz for you on this lovely day-before-Friday morning:

1. Why does United States Attorney General Eric Holder need “five days on the taxpayer’s dime hopping around Caribbean islands in the name of improving law enforcement in the region?” as Daily Beast writer John Solomon so aptly asks.

2. Why would he especially be doing this right after President Obama outlined his new austerity plan to cut down on government spending?

3. Why does the United States government need to employ 65,000 TSA workers in airports all across the country, when they’ve allowed a collective 25,000 security breaches in the past decade, including the Underwear Bomber?

4. Why does the United States Department of Energy dole out money to haphazard visionaries with sketchy business plans as if taxpayer money grows on trees?

And a bonus question: Why did we bail out General Motors when it was just going to suck up and shred taxpayer money – now $9 billion and probably rising – like there was no tomorrow to worry about?

For Q1, you can argue that Eric Holder doesn’t feel like dealing with the aftermath of his disastrous Fast and Furious gun running scheme. As for Q2, let’s face it: Obama’s rules and regulations don’t apply to his friends, cronies or fellow liberals, which exempts Holder three times over.

Q3’s answer should read something along the lines of “Because they say so. So there! Now shut up and get back in line to be photographed naked and possibly catch cancer.” And Q4 comes down to this: Obama’s buddies need their money somehow, right?

Of course, I’ll also except the following blanket answers for all of them, including the bonus question: The government is incompetent, the government doesn’t respect the people, or the government just really doesn’t want to face the facts … despite all of the evidence piling higher and higher around it like so many stacked notices of payment due.

Hedge fund legend Mark Mobius stated the extreme obvious when he predicted the certainty of “another financial crisis around the corner because we haven’t solved any of the things that caused the previous crisis.” That much is extremely obvious, considering the state of the Western world.

Things just keep getting worse in Europe, with Spain’s 10-year debt costs hitting new highs and so many other countries in the euro zone on the ropes as well. And now Fitch Ratings says that, “Unless the euro zone debt crisis is resolved in a timely and orderly manner, the broad credit outlook for the U.S. banking industry could worsen.”

There’s no quick way out of this mess, but there’s still two very obvious steps we can take right away: Stop spending money we don’t have on things we don’t need and then kick the bums out.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Man Who Throws Shoe at George Bush Declared Hero; Man Who Shoots at Obama’s White House Declared Mentally Ill

Last week, apparently somebody took a shot or two at the White House from the Washington Mall, with one bullet even hitting a window. ABC reports: “The round was stopped by ballistic glass behind the historic exterior glass, while an additional round has been found on the exterior of the White House.”

The news service was also quick to assure everyone that the 21-year-old suspect, Oscar Ramiro Ortega, is thought to be mentally ill. After all, why else would anybody – outside of the deranged Tea Party racist types, of course – want to attack Barack Obama, the beloved leader of the free world?

Especially a Hispanic? Clearly, if he doesn’t recognize all of the good things Obama has done for minorities, he must be deranged!

Right? Of course! No other way to look at it. Moving on now…

But let’s play pretend and say that Ortega – who has a long rap sheet for such things as domestic violence and drug charges – went to Washington to shoot the Bush White House instead.

If that had happened, he would have been hailed as a hero.

News agencies would have noted Bush’s unpopularity amongst minorities – and in general – and then gone on to list all of the grievances America’s oppressed had against the President, including Katrina (which Bush clearly sent since he “hates black people” like Kanye West said).

They would have gone into detail about Ortega’s difficult upbringing, what he had to suffer, how he tried so hard to succeed and how Bush just wouldn’t give him a chance. And, let’s face it, they would have all but praised him for taking more than pot shots at the President.

We know that because of how the news agencies covered the shoe-throwing incident in Iraq not all that long ago.

Instead, since this is Obama residing in the posh place, the media covers up the story for a decent week and then explains it away as a simply irrational act made by an irrational person.

Now don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying that Ortega isn’t mentally disturbed. And one way or the other, I hope that they find him and lock him up where he can’t shoot at anybody again, including President Obama.

I’m just saying that it’s hard not to notice the difference in coverage.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Further Proof that Occupy Wall Streeters Are Insane and Celebrities Don’t Care about the Little People Like They Say They Do

It’s becoming evermore clear that the Occupy Wall Street movement is filled with some of the whiniest losers ever to inhabit the planet.

If they were animals (which is a possibility considering that they poop on the sidewalk like dogs), they would have been picked off ages ago by predators who were taking easy advantage of the sorriest pickings available.

Then again, maybe they’d just kill each other off naturally – since they seem to have no problem turning on each other – or more than likely just starve to death, since they have no idea how to do anything useful or intelligent.

They highlighted all three negative characteristics when superstar rapper Jay-Z promoted one of the newest editions to his clothing line, Rocawear: a t-shirt that features the slogan: “Occupy All Streets” in support of his (less rich, less cool, less intelligent) fellow thugs camped out in cities around the country.

Occupy Wall Streeters went nuts (more than they already are, that is) over the merchandise. And then they went even more insane when Rocawear issued a statement that it hadn’t agreed to give any of the proceeds to the whiny bunch of self-made losers.

One Occupy Wall Street leader roared that making bling off the $22 shirts was “an insult to the fight for economic civil rights.” Forget the fact that, as businessman Russell Simmons noted, the merchandise “did a good fun thing to promote awareness.”

Oh no, Occupy Wall Street wants more.

They always want more. When it comes down to it, they’re more greedy than the rich, “fat cats” they’re protesting. At least the rich, fat cats do something to earn their money; OWS mainly stands there and whines (and goes to the bathroom on the sidewalk).

Besides, how do they think Jay-Z got the money to start Rocawear in the first place? By standing there and whining (and going to the bathroom on the sidewalk)?

Of course, it’s not completely and totally Occupy Wall Street’s fault that they automatically think that celebrities would give them the shirt off their back (Ha ha! Get? Get it?). After all, Hollywood likes to cultivate a certain image of being an all-caring community that supports the underdog, whether they be whiny losers (OWS), pedophiles and rapists (Woody Allen, Roman Polanski), or just plain, all-around, brain-dead, vapid viruses with no grasp on reality (fill in the blank).

Yet when it comes down to it, celebrities are really looking out for number one.

It kinda makes one think that Occupy Wall Street and Hollywood deserve each other.

Monday, November 14, 2011

President Obama Sees Progress in Sanctions against Iran… and Possibly Still Believes in Santa Clause too

If President Obama isn’t trying to mislead the country, then that’s a really sad commentary on his intellectual prowess, or lack thereof.

Along with calling the U.S. “a little bit lazy” in the business arena, President Obama apparently thinks that international sanctions against Iran are really working. Worse yet, he wants to consult China and Russia before going forward with any new plans to dissuade the hardcore Islamist nation from building a nuclear bomb.

I really hope for his sake that he’s really just nefarious and not that nearly that stupid at all. Because all of the available evidence strongly suggests – if not shouts from the mountaintops – that Iran could care less about its international law… and that Russia and China are comfy, cozy, slutty in its bed.

Haven’t we had enough proof by now that Russia and China not only really dislike the U.S. but are also going so far as to help Iran by way of selling them weapons… despite the supposedly airtight sanctions?

Haven’t we also had enough proof that Iran doesn’t respect anything but force? When we offer hands of friendship, professionalism or even common courtesy, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and his regime simply bite our hands like rabid dogs.

Case in point: Iranian Foreign Minister Ali Akbar Salehi says he see “no more point in making additional concessions” regarding his country’s hotly contested nuclear program, even though he and his haven’t made any notable concessions throughout this entire process!

If anything, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu says, Iran is even closer to producing an atom bomb than everybody would like to think.

And yet we keep relying on the same methods to woo the hate-mongering, reality-denying, tyrannical regime from the dark side, begging a very simple but very important question: Why?

Honestly, I’m not sure if it would be better for the United States if the answer was “Because Obama is an incompetent fool” or “Because Obama is out to destroy the America most of us know, love and vastly benefit from.”

Again, for his sake, I’m hoping that it’s the former.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Joe Arpaio Says There’s No Difference Between Obama Supporters and Mexican Drug Cartels… Chris Rock Proves Otherwise

Arizona’s Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio is well used to controversy. The self-described “America’s toughest sheriff” almost welcomes it with his letter-of-the-law stance on immigration so close to the Mexican border.

“I’m a controversial guy,” he freely admits, and he’s inviting even more controversy now that he’s conducting an official investigation into Barack Obama’s eligibility to be president of the United States. This includes determining whether Obama is using an illegal Social Security number and birth certificate.

“I’ve got the drug cartels from Mexico sending me death threats and now I have the Obama supporters sending me death threats,” Arpaio told WND news. “I’m not sure which are worse.”

But let’s face it: There is a difference. The Mexican drug cartels, after all, are more than willing to put their money where their mouths are. Most of the Obama supporters, on the other hand, would just dance on Arpaio’s grave after somebody else offed him.

Not to mention that the Mexican drug cartels actually make sense (maybe because they say less and shoot more) in a non-ethical kind-of way. Obama supporters like supposed comedian Chris Rock don’t even come close.

Rock excuses the President’s disappointing performance this far since there’s apparently a “f*cking art to the first term… It’s like Clinton’s first term. You can’t really do your gangsta sh*t until your second term… Even Bush couldn’t really f*ck up the world until his second term. That’s when he put the hammer down.”

Actually, Clinton tried his “gangsta sh*t” during his first term… and was soundly rebuked for it in the mid-term elections. And Bush got us into both Iraq and Afghanistan – two of his biggest cardinal sins, according to Liberals – before the 2004 elections.

Clearly, Chris Rock is an all-around moron, a trait he went on to highlight in great detail:

“The last George Bush we had was the first cable TV president we had. And what I mean by that… he was the first president that was only president to the people that voted for him. He did not give a f*ck about the people that didn’t vote for him. Obama is actually trying to be president to the whole country and there’s a lot of compromise being president to the whole country… In a weird way our complaints about Obama is because we miss Bush. We miss hating somebody. We miss the guy who didn’t give a f*ck… Bush didn’t give a f*ck about us. He just really, really didn’t. We want revenge; we don’t want justice. That’s the problem with the Democrats. We want revenge.”

I’d ask somebody – Maybe the Mexican drug cartels? – to translate Rock’s rambling, but it would be one giant waste of both of our time.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

How the Liberals Stole Christmas

How do liberals celebrate Christmas?

Well, let’s just say it isn’t with eggnog, nativity sets and good cheer. They’re much more interested in handing out extra taxes to rich and poor alike than presents or kisses under the mistletoe.

The Heritage Foundation reported yesterday that: “President Obama’s Agriculture Department today announced that it will impose a new 15-cent charge on all fresh Christmas trees – the Christmas Tree Tax – to support a new Federal program to improve the image and marketing of Christmas trees.”

Please somebody tell me what in the world that even means!

Do we really need government holding our hands and helping us pick out just the right tree? Maybe they can take us home afterwards, make us sugar-free hot chocolate (Without the marshmallows, of course. Michelle wouldn’t approve.) and tuck us into bed with a revised version of A Christmas Carol… where Scrooge goes on counting his money and Tiny Tim starves to death.

Here’s a simple way to “improve the image and marketing of Christmas Trees”… Don’t tax them!

And – Bonus! – here’s a simple way to keep the spirit of Christmas in general: Don’t make things difficult for charitable organizations. I.e. don’t make a fuss about the Air Force Academy promoting Operation Christmas Child, even if it does include a Christian message and is sponsored by an evangelical Christian group.

Who cares!

Apparently Mikey Weinstein does, since he accused AFA commanders of unprofessional and unconstitutional behavior, as well as “arrogance beyond measure” for promoting the Christmas program, which sends toys and necessities to impoverished children around the world.

Seriously, if this is how liberals celebrate Christmas, with shades of Ceasar Augustus and the pre-reformed Ebenezer Scrooge, I’d hate to see how they celebrate Easter…

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

President Obama May Talk the Christian Talk (Sometimes) but He Walks a Different Walk Much More Often Than Not

Once upon a time, Barack Hussein Obama (mmm… mmm… mmm) went out of his way to declare himself a Christian.

But of course, that was then (during the wooing phase) and this is now (during the you’re-married-to-me-and-better-do-what-I-say-or-else stage).

Oh, the President still gives lip service occasionally. While pushing his so-called jobs bill (again) last week, he chastised the House of Representatives for passing a bill to keep “In God We Trust” as the official U.S. motto.

“That’s not putting people back to work,” he mocked. “I trust in God, but God wants to see us help ourselves by putting people back to work.”

Incidentally, press secretary Jay Carney went on to defend his boss for the remarks by claiming that the Bible specifically says: “The Lord helps those who help themselves.” Clearly, Carney last opened a Bible around the time Obama consulted the Christian God.

The same can be said for the rest of Obama’s administration, who seem far more worried about offending people who have a problem with Christianity than anything else. Take the Interior Department’s Bureau of Land Management, which thinks that adding FDR’s D-Day prayer to the National Mall’s WWII Memorial would “dilute” its message and interfere with its ability to “inspire” visitors.

As if Christianity is something to be ashamed about.

Yet in matters of foreign aid, the U.S. doesn’t think it dilutes anything to shell out money to the Islamic parties taking over in countries like Egypt and Libya. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton just declared yesterday that, even though “there will be times when not all of our interests align” (Like maybe when they want to kill us?!!), the Obama administration will support the new governments as legitimate and respectable.

No such consideration, however, is given to our long-time ally, Israel, whom the Bible declares to be God’s chosen and beloved. At the G20 summit recently, President Obama and his French counterpart, Nicholas Sarkozy accidentally publicly admitted their joint dislike of Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.

When Sarkozy grumbled that he couldn’t stand Netanyahu, Obama replied: You’re fed up with him? I have to deal with him every day!”

Obama’s actions and attitude very clearly do not align themselves with Christian values. But I wouldn’t be too hasty in pegging him as a devout Muslim either.

Honestly, if I had to guess at Obama’s religion, I’d say he worships himself.

Monday, November 7, 2011

The Heritage Foundation Takes on Failed Liberal Ideas

The countdown has officially begun: It’s exactly one year away from elections 2012, and the Heritage Foundation has prepared a little quiz to help U.S. voters everywhere see how very flawed liberal thinking really is.

Admittedly, “failure” and “liberal” are so close to synonymous that it seems pointless to put the one in front of the other, but for certain kinds of people, I guess you can never be too clear.

You can take the quiz at, where you’ll learn fascinating facts about the War on Poverty, like the fact that it “spawned a welfare mentality that has trapped the poor in a web of dependency, spent $16 trillion – without making a dent in the poverty rate – and will burn through another $10.3 trillion over the next 10 years.”

Also on the list of failed liberal ideas are:
  • The U.S. Department of Education
  • The U.S. Department of Energy
  • The Community Reinvestment Act
  • Immigration Reform (liberal-style)

Each one has failed miserably in accomplishing its original agenda – or at least the agendas they purport to have – bloated government, intruded on individual rights, sucked up taxpayer money, and just generally been a giant waste of time and effort.

No big surprise there. But it's still good to see just how bad the situation is now that we're getting so close to being able to do something about it.

Friday, November 4, 2011

Why the Herman Cain Sexual Harassment Scandal Isn’t Doing Women Any Favors

As a woman, I’m beginning to get really annoyed with the media’s handling of the sexual harassment charges against Herman Cain. This prolonged lip service to the individual women involved and their so-far sketchy accusations aren’t doing womankind any favors.

Quite the opposite in fact. This whole media circus – regardless of whether the accusations are true or not – is making a joke of sexual harassment and what it is to be a woman in general.

Being a woman means struggling for respect in the workplace a little bit more than men do, since we not only have to think about our performance but also the way we dress, and the way we approach our male colleagues and bosses concerning ideas or issues (since, let’s face it, an opinionated man is much more likely to be considered a leader than an opinionated woman, who more often than not gets the you-know-what label). We even have to worry about the way we walk, since some men think that if our hips naturally sway when we’re moving, we’re intentionally giving them excuses to behave like pigs.

That’s why being a woman means taking especially careful notice when we’re walking by alleys or leaving work for the parking lot or stranded on the side of the road. It means calling friends to come drive us less than a mile down the road – an easy walk – to go get our cars from the mechanic in broad daylight because the area is just slightly sketchy.

And it means shutting up and taking crude comments, crude looks and even a few crude touches now and again from the men around us, whether it’s the cocky thug in the mall or the suited coworker down the hall. Because the alternative mess for dealing with such small violations just isn’t worth it.

That’s what it means.

Now don’t get me wrong, because it also means a lot of great stuff, and I wouldn’t trade being female for anything. (Well, maybe just for a day to see what really goes on in men’s brains.) I also fully acknowledge that men face pressures and conflicts that most women don’t, and I seriously respect the ones who take each of those challenges head on and still come out as, well, men.

… In other words, not the kind of people who capitalize on the usual imbalances in life for political purposes, which is exactly what is happening with Herman Cain right now. The total lack of clarity in the accusations against him from the women and the lawyers and the media is just making things even harder for women everywhere.

If the charges are true, then the women should make up their minds to either step forward with the full details or shut up entirely. This wishy-washy back and forth and in-between isn’t progressing women’s rights at all; it’s just throwing their stories into a very bad light and portraying women everywhere as gold-digging little hussies who are asking for it.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

And the Most Incompetent Criminals Ever Award Goes to…

Call me sick and twisted, but I find this story far too amusing not to mention:

Meet Tyree Seegers, Omar Villota and Johel Gomez, three incompetent criminals who thought it’d be a great idea to go into U.S. Chicken in Patterson, New Jersey and carry out what appeared to be completely pointless attacks.

And it all got blatantly caught on camera.

Seegers and Gomez confronted their first victim as he was trying to leave the restaurant, giving Villota time to come up and pistol whip the man in the back of his head. They exit the scene scuffling with each other.

But a few minutes later, the trio reappears on tape dragging a struggling second man back inside, where they proceed to punch him repeatedly in the face.

Now getting all of this caught on a live video feed without the cover of ski masks or some other disguise is really pretty stupid. But apparently, they weren’t satisfied with just being pointlessly violent incompetent wastes of breath. No, they had bigger goals… like shooting for the Darwin Awards (though they ultimately failed at that too. Maybe an honorary mention is deserved?).

Somehow outfitted with a machete all of a sudden, Seegers starts swinging the weapon at the victim over a dozen times. And as the local CBS News puts it: “During one of his swings, he chops into Villota, who is continually pistol-whipping the victim. Seegers nearly severs Villota’s right arm, leaving a blood trail that the cops used to track them down.”

See what I mean? Clearly, these men are out to prove that we all really did evolve from less intelligent life forms… and that we can revert right back without too much effort.

And they deserve even more points for incompetence since the victim wasn’t even seriously injured in the sustained attack thanks to Seegers’ unfathomably pathetic machete skills.

So even though all three hoodlums didn’t manage to make it into the Darwin Awards, I think we can all agree they definitely deserve a permanent place in the annals of FMyLife.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Herman Cain vs. the Woman Issue

As a female, I’m particularly partial to the feminine perspective. And I’ll flat-out admit that I’ve been known to take the girls’ side with little to no factual basis before.

Like the whole Duke University stripper affair, where I thought the frat boys involved were guilty as hell. Even now that their accuser has been proven a piece of lying trash, I still have a hard time feeling bad for the lads since they hired her in the first place.

In my book, even that legal form of objectification makes them worthy of my derision regardless of what else did or did not happen. I believe that women deserve respect, including the God-given right to be seen as something more than a HPOA.

In addition, I’ve been on the receiving end of sexual harassment before (saying “victim” sounds far too melodramatic for anything not involving direct threats or hands-on activity), so I understand how frustrating and uncomfortable it is to get unwanted attention.

But I’m still having a hard time accepting the accusations of sexual harassment or sexual impropriety against GOP presidential hopeful Herman Cain.

Let me be blunt: I like Herman Cain and I think he’d make a great president… and not just compared to Obama, since that isn’t saying much. Now let me be blunt again: I like being female more than I like Herman Cain.

Yet – while I don’t want to lightly dismiss a woman’s claim of sexual harassment – the truth is there is good reason to doubt it happened considering several factors, including society’s tendency to look out for number one and the mainstream media’s habits.

Let’s face it: People with big money can make easy targets for the less scrupulous. Just look at all of the sports players who have been accused of sexual improprieties, only to have the accusers later admit that they lied. (My Steeler’s Ben Rothlesberger excluded, since I’m still on the fence about that case and I think he’s a dumb slut regardless.)

Perhaps more importantly, look at the way the mainstream media lobs false accusations and baseless derision at conservatives all the time, while ignoring or excusing such pathetic liberals as Anthony Weiner, Elliot Spitzer, John Edwards and, yes, Bill Clinton, who was accused how many times of sexual harassment, sexual assault and flat-out rape?

That’s why, even if Herman Cain’s accusers step forward with details of their allegations as the one woman apparently hopes to in the days ahead, I’m still going to have to give my vote to Herman Cain over my ladies on this one unless I get stark proof of indecency.

Until then, Herman Cain unashamedly remains my candidate of choice.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

It's Looking Like the Greek Bailout Might Need a Bailout too

You know, it was just last month – just last week! – that Europe announced it had reached a solution to keep Greece from sliding into official bankruptcy (as opposed to unofficial bankruptcy, which – let’s face it – it’s already in).

Everybody rejoiced, the markets rallied and people breathed a sigh of relief knowing that the problem was covered up (with a very thin blanked, mind you) for the time being. Maybe not for very long, but it didn’t have to be dealt with again right away at least.

And why do something today that can be dealt with tomorrow… especially when tomorrow never comes?

After three years of throwing money into one black hole after another, nobody with even a smidgen of common sense believed that this latest round of lunacy was going to work long-term. But it turns out that it might very well not work short-term either.

The UK’s Telegraph predicted as much just on Saturday in a piece entitled “Why the latest eurozone bail-out is destined to fail within weeks.” Economic agenda writer Liam Halligan said that “the responses of our politicians to recent financial troubles – hiding behind complexity and kicking the can down the road – have not only failed to temper the volatility, but have actually made it much worse.”

Politicians making things worse: Whooda thunk?

They’re like little children trying to avoid punishment by making up one really stupid, obvious lie to cover up another really stupid, obvious lie to explain away the living room lamp that they broke when they conveniently even though they knew they weren’t supposed to be playing ball there in the first place.

If you want the nitty gritty details of just how royally they messed things up this time, feel free to read the rest of Halligan’s comments on the subject. But be aware that it might sound like a lot of technical gobbledygook, mainly because it is, since politicians convoluted the whole situation long before the 2008 global financial meltdown.

The situation doesn’t have to be convoluted though, or at least not any more so. Greece was naughty and spent money it never had – mainly on social spending, union pensions and the like – so now it needs to face the consequences.

I think I speak for many when I beg the eurozone to just let Greece fail already! Because everybody knows it’s going to happen eventually anyway.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Shades of Clarence Thomas in the Herman Cain “Sex Scandal?”

It looks like the media is stepping up its game on Herman Cain, ditching – for now – attempts to paint him as a fool and instead trying to make him look like a hound dog, rather like they did with the Clarence Thomas sex scandal two decades before.

Back in 1991, when President George H. W. Bush nominated Clarence Thomas to the U.S. Supreme Court, the left called on Anita Hill to step forward with allegations of sexual harassment against the black conservative.

Nothing was ever proven and Thomas was confirmed regardless. But the left isn’t terribly imaginative (or intelligent) and so they’ve apparently decided to try, try again like the old school nursery maxim instructs all good little kindergarteners.

So that’s exactly what they’re doing, though instead of producing one woman to brand the enemy this time, they’re calling on two this time. Sort-of.

Once again, nothing has been proven in a court of law, so it’s mere allegations at play. And apparently, neither woman involved can come forward and say anything since they signed confidentiality agreements.

But Politico is still all too happy to publish a four page report about Cain’s time as head of the National Restaurant Association in 1990s, when two “women complained of sexually suggestive behavior by Cain that made them angry and uncomfortable.”

Because sexual harassment usually feels so good?

Not really sure what Politico is trying to say there, so I’m just going to dismiss the two adjectives as mere melodramatic journalistic spin, the kind the mainstream media is very well known for.

Knowing how they are, it’s quite tempting to dismiss the whole story as mere propaganda for the left. So tempting in fact, that’s it’s very nearly impossible to resist.

And who am I to defy such odds?

At this point, I have far better things to do than start believing the mainstream media when they cry wolf… even if it is Halloween.