Tuesday, August 30, 2011

This Just In: Sun Causes Man-Made Climate Change

If you only read one news story today, make it James Delingpole’s “Sun Causes Climate Change Shock” in the UK’s Telegraph. It’s a bit long but it’s well worth the read.

It details how, after a few decades of mind-numbing, zombie-producing, media-backed, government-pushed proselytizing about the ravages of man-made global warming/climate change/terrestrial atmospheric palpitations (My term. Amazing, isn’t it?), it’s come out:

It’s all a farce!

Feel free to put your head between your legs or breathe into a paper bag if you need to. Take a few minutes to recompose yourself; nobody will blame you.

After all, the scientific scandals of the last few years, the severe winters striking the globe, and sheer common sense weren’t nearly enough to convince any reasonable person that climate change wasn’t just a pathetic political push for power.

No. This is shocking news!

It’s also exceedingly damning news, since it comes from CERN, the same highly respected group responsible for the World Wide Web and the Large Hadron Collider. Despite heavy opposition, CERN went so far as to create a model of the Earth’s atmosphere to analyze the theory of man-made global warming once and for all.

The theory crashed and burned. (Remember: breathe.)

Really though, there’s no reason for the global warming group to stress out just yet.

The government-funded scientific community will ignore this inconvenient fact. And the media will keep publishing idiot – and increasingly more desperate – stories about how climate change might lead to alien attacks on Earth and an increase in mental illnesses.

Regardless, I don’t see global warming sticking around for all that much longer. But that doesn’t mean people won’t cling to the notion as long as they possible can.

Sadly, far too many scientists, politicians and members of the general public have committed far too much time, money and effort to the idea.

They have made this their life. And they’re not willing to give it up anytime soon.

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