Friday, October 28, 2011

Students Teaching Against Racism Preaches How to (Politically) Correct Your Halloween Costume

If you’re planning on donning a Halloween costume this weekend, you might want to rethink your outfit, says a group of Ohio University students.

Students Teaching Against Racism in Society (STARS) – as opposed to Students Teaching Against Racism in a Vacuum (STARV) – officially launched a now nationally known campaign against dressing up as anything that smacks of stereotyping, i.e. Japanese geishas, Latinos in ponchos and sombreros, Arab terrorists, etc.

If the admittedly short news story on this latest outbreak of political correctness is any indication, STARS would have no problem if you want to slap a cowboy hat on your head and pinning a star to your leather vest, however.

Also not mentioned were the prima ballerinas – who always get a bad rap – Darth Vader – who nobody remembers for his epic opt for good in his final moments – Big Bird – who, along with so many other fictitious critters, went full slut last year… probably without their signed and recorded consent! – and countless other much-maligned characters and groups.

I was going to dress up as Snow White for Halloween, since my dark curly locks automatically lend themselves to such an outfit, but who knows what real-life princesses I might offend with what could all too easily be seen as a stereotype? (I’m sorry Kate!) Or with any other costume, for that matter?

Clearly, the only solution to this dilemma is to ban all costumes altogether! And while we’re at it, in an effort to really make sure we never, ever, ever offend anybody else ever again, let’s ban people too!

Though maybe that won’t be enough since, according to PETA’s lawsuit against SeaWorld, we need to be considering animals’ feelings to. And you know how cruel they can be when a stripe or spot is out of place… so maybe we should ban them too.

But that still leaves Mother Earth, which could potentially be offended at the sheer lack of sentient life left on the planet. So perhaps nuking the planet into oblivion is really the only way to go.

That way – maybe – Students Teaching Against Racism in Society and the rest of the PC crowd will stop complaining about potentially offensive material.

And the rest of us will finally have some peace and quiet.


  1. I couldn't stop Laughing! I'm the Bavarian guy along with my liter of Oktoberfest beer, so I shall surely be offending some teetotaler Germans assuming any such creatures exist! LOL

  2. I thought you'd like this one. lol. And drink a beer or two for me! Sadly, since it's supposed to snow tomorrow, I probably won't be having even a single drink.