Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Nick Cannon Goes Whiteface… And Then Gets Racist

If you have any kind of a Yahoo account, you’ve probably already seen that Nick Cannon, Mariah Carey’s husband, decided to do “whiteface.” As in, he’s a black man who painted his skin – rather realistically too, if I might add – to look like he’s white.

As with everything else in life, people took offense at that.

I didn’t. At first.

You see, I could really care less if someone wants to pretend to be something they’re  not, just as long as it’s done with the right attitude. Blackface, whiteface, greenface… Who cares?

I get why blackface used to be offensive, but guess what? Times change; so do meanings.

“Gay” used to mean “happy.” “Kid” used to only refer to a “baby goat.” And religious freedom used to mean the government couldn’t shove its delusions of godhood down our throats.

See what I mean?

That’s why I didn’t take offense when I saw the Yahoo headline about Nick Cannon’s whiteface. In fact, I was going to write a post declaring just how little I took offense. I even barely cared when I read his accompanying Instagram caption:

“It’s official… I’m white!!! #WHITEPEOPLEPARTYMUSIC #Wppm in stores April 1st!!!!!!Dude Go Get It!!!Join The Party!!!! #GoodCredit #DogKissing #BeerPong #FarmersMarkets #FistPumping #CreamCheeseEating #RacialDraft “Bro I got drafted!!”

Sure, the “racialdraft” part might be kinda irritating. Depending on what it means. (I don’t know and I don’t care nearly enough to find out.) But he’s Hollywood. And he married Mariah Carey.

Enough said.

Also, I never knew only white people ate cream cheese? Thanks for that little lesson, Nick.

What I do find far less tasteful is his “white boy” name of “Smallnut.” And his Tweets after people started freaking out on him, such as: “Damn I didn’t know it was going to be this hard being White! … I’m exhausted with all this ‘privilege’ LOL #WhitePeopleProblems” and “I think we should have a million white man march and protest @NickCannon album!!! Somebody call @rushlimbaugh’ LOL”

You know baby boy, you’ve got a million-dollar moron of a wife, meaning that you’ve got a lot more of that “privilege” you’re mocking me for. How about you drop income brackets down to my level and see what my “privilege” really looks like before you start making fun of it.

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