Friday, February 28, 2014

President Obama Actually Said Something Worthwhile Last Night!

I never thought I’d actually agree with an Obama speech, but apparently hell has frozen over.

I should have known as much when I woke up shivering this morning and couldn’t get warm for anything.

Yesterday, our President, Barack Obama, kicked off his “My Brother’s Keeper” initiative from the White House. And while I’m sure he made some really stupid comments during the commemorative speech, the ones being reported by Yahoo! this morning are quite accurate and even inspiring.

Aiming his remarks at young minority men, specifically black and Hispanic youth, he said:

“Nothing will be given to you. The world is tough out there. There’s a lot of competition for jobs and college positions, and everybody has to work hard. But I know you guys cans succeed.”

Wow. Wow. Wow!

That was seriously refreshing.

Admittedly, it would be nice if Obama would put his politics where his mouth is, but I truly hope that young people of all races hear those words and accept them.

Life isn’t easy. But it is worth fighting for, even when that fight means making personal sacrifices for a better future.

So take Obama’s advice this one time, guys.

Accept the world for what it is – both good and bad – and do what you can with what you got!

Thursday, February 27, 2014

Beyonce Proves – Again – Just How Low a Woman Can Go

Over the weekend, my younger brother introduced me to Beyoncé’s latest release, Partition. I didn’t listen to the whole song or watch the whole video, but what I saw was enough.

Thanks for that, Munchkin. You’re such a gem.

As one guest commenter wrote on fishwrapper.com, “… her song lyrics are basically a better written, more entertaining 50 shades of grey,” which, incidentally, was one of the most demeaning, emotionally manipulative, talentless pieces of trash I’ve ever personally read. (And I’ve read Michael Moore, so that says something.)

Admittedly, that same commenter, Stephen, went on to defend Beyoncé, claiming that despite resembling Fifty Shades of Grey, “…I still think she is doing something different. It’s a celebration the love she share while being married and having a kid. I just hate that she is being grouped in with Miley. That girl is not worthy of being mentioned on the same website, let alone the same post as Beyonce.”

Now everyone is entitled to their own opinion, of course, even if it’s blatantly wrong… But this guy is blatantly wrong.

Before you start judging me as a hater, consider the opening lines of Partition:

“Driver roll up the partition please
I don’t need you seeing Yonce on your knees
Oh he so horny, yeah he want to f*ck
He popped all my buttons, and he ripped my blouse
He Monica Lewinsky-ed all on my gown”

How is that a “celebration” of anything but female degradation? If Beyoncé likes to kneel down for her husband in the back of a limo, that seems potentially disrespectful to the driver – who’s doubtlessly going to know exactly what’s going on back there – but I won’t harp on that.

What I am going to point out is that Beyoncé blatantly compares herself to an emotionally manipulated intern being exploited by a sexual predator.

Interesting, right?

She’s also broadcasting her sexual preferences – or what she’s been told are her sexual preferences – to a bunch of girls who look up to her as an ideal to be and a bunch of boys who look up to her as an ideal to get.

Not to harp on the point, but that ideal is then to demean and be demeaned.

Awesome.

Do you know what else is the same shade of awesome? Our President, Barack Obama.

Wanna know how we know Obama is a failure at life? Because he stood up at a fundraiser during his reelection campaign in 2012 and declared that “Beyoncé could not be a better role model for my girls.”

Those poor children. They have my most sincere and deepest sympathies.

Friday, February 21, 2014

Lego Sells Out to Socialists and Makes a Whole Lot of Capitalist Money Doing So

How does a capitalist corporation get by in this increasingly socialistic society of ours?

If you really want to know the answer to that question, ask Lego Corporation, which released its latest film about a week ago. The thing minted $70 million it its first few days. How?

By depicting capitalists as bad, bad people and capitalism itself as oppressive.

The Weekly Standard writes:

“Never before in history have liberal clichés about the evils and the rapacity of capitalism been combined so ironically as they are in The Lego Movie… a film in which a character called President Business (also known as Lord Business) has totalitarian control over the moods and thoughts of every character and intends to destroy the world in a few days’ time.”

Hmmm… Kinda sounds exactly like socialism, right?

Totally! And Lego’s executives have to know that. They’re not stupid. They’re just sellouts. Very business savvy ones.

Not following? Read on…

“The critics who like The Lego Movie – and that is most of them… have fallen over themselves to remark on its ‘subversive’ qualities,” The Weekly Standard continues. “By this they mean that though it may have been made by major multinational conglomerates, it somehow manages, without those conglomerates knowing it, to blow the whistle satirically on their soul-deadening conformist hypnosis.”

Little do those idiot critics know that Lego is playing them for all they’re worth, which is a lot.

You see, those critics have a lot of sway when it comes to how much films gross at the box office. Their good opinion can make a movie, and their bad opinion can break one. And since they all think they’re socialists, they’re going to give socialist propaganda better reviews.

Duh.

Realizing this, Lego ditched its previous plots – which basically went unnoticed at the box office – and shoved every single stupid rant against capitalism into a single reportedly entertaining movie.

The result? Instant success! The critics love it!

In the long run, appeasing the socialists isn't going to do anyone any good, but in the short-term, Lego is laughing all the way to the bank.

Thursday, February 20, 2014

Joe Biden Says Obamacare Would Be Off to a Hell of a Start if It Only Misses by a Million

Vice President Joe Biden is always good for a laugh.

Like when he tries to defend the disastrous Obamacare rollout by claiming that “we may not get to seven million, but if we get to five or six million, that’s a hell of a start.”

Why is that so funny?

For one thing, not even 3.3 million have signed up yet, as of the end of January. According to CBS, that’s about 75% short of original expectations.

75%!

Then there’s also the fact that, even if they do somehow manage to make it to five or six million by the healthcare exchanges’ six-month anniversary in April, that’s still an entire million or two less than projected.

I’m fairly sure that missing the mark that badly isn’t anything so positive as “a hell of a start”… unless he’s talking about a much more literal hell.

If that’s the case, we can take Biden seriously. For the first time in his entire political career.

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Obamacare Strikes Again: California Man Can’t Get Desperately Needed Back Surgery

A California man can’t get the back surgery he needs.

Why?


I’d say no joke, but by now these kinds of stories are nearly monotonous reality. At least to those of who are still in good health. I’m assuming it’s fairly agonizing to someone who “is in so much pain that he can barely walk,” as CBS puts it.

The doctor-less patient in question, a Chris Dunn, explains it this way: “I can’t sleep on my back. I roll around all night, because I can’t lay flat. I can’t lay anywhere for more than five, 10 minutes.”

In addition, he walks with a limp and goes to work despite his oftentimes excruciating pain.

Before anyone mocks him for signing up under Obamacare in the first place, apparently Dunn and his wife switched over from a regular Blue Cross plan in January to prevent paying the increased premium, which had recently skyrocketed…

Also thanks to Obamacare.

My most sincere sympathy goes out to Mr. Dunn. I can’t imagine what he’s going through.

And Obama frankly doesn’t care.

Friday, February 14, 2014

My Car Is Stuck in the Snow Thanks to Global Warming... But God Is Still Awesome

I just went outside to shovel out my car after the latest round of snowstorms, and guess what? That wasn't happening.

Thanks to the freezing rain we got after the snow yesterday, which incidentally prevented me from shoveling out then, the snow is not only piled high but packed hard.

Happy Valentine's Day to me!

This is where a girl really wouldn't mind that knight in shining white armor. He can leave the horse at home though. What I really want is a snow shovel. Or a snow plow.

I mean, come on... Nothing says love like a man with a snow blower!

On the plus side, the sun is shining, the birds aren't singing (I find the noises they make irritating) and I have chocolate in the fridge.

Oh yeah, and God is awesome... no matter how bad global warming/climate change/seasonal adjustments in temperature gets. :-)

Thursday, February 13, 2014

China Sets Itself up for a World of Hurt With Socialism-Induced Pollution Problems

As the 2014 Winter Olympics continue in Sochi, Russia, a former socialist utopia and still a strong supporter of such to this day, let’s turn our attention to another strange economic hybrid: China.

Now, China has embraced capitalism with far more fervor than Russia. That’s why China has actually been growing and can produce fully-functioning hotels.

However, China’s capitalism is still government-enforced. Which makes it socialism, just a more benign blend. To some degree, anyway. Though not from an I-don’t-want-to-die-from-lung-cancer kind of way.

Late last night, Reuters reported that “Severe pollution in Beijing has made the Chinese capital ‘barely suitable’ for living, according to an official Chinese report, as the world’s second-largest economy tries to reduce often hazardous levels of smog caused by decades of rapid growth.”

Note those last four words: “decades of rapid growth.” That GDP expansion is around 10% a year, which makes outside investors swoon with dollar signs in their eyes when the largest economy in the world (That’d be the U.S.) is doing darn decent if she grows at 4% a year.

But there’s a reason or two why China is growing so quickly, and neither is particularly cheery.

Number One: China suffered so long under socialism that it was, and still is to some degree, a wreck of a nation. There was pretty much nowhere to go but up.

Number Two: The socialism 2.0 that China has since adopted has the government pouring money into state-owned businesses and housing projects instead of freeing people to learn and build and grow on their own.

Which, incidentally, they’re perfectly capable of. Not only are humans in general resourceful enough to find their way when given a choice, but the Chinese particularly have a long history of great accomplishments and innovations. Their government isn’t giving them nearly enough credit, as governments seldom do.

Governments are much better at messing things up, as evidenced by the extreme pollution problems China is experiencing. Smog, acid rain, lung cancer, birth defects, extreme allergies… The list of health issues the Chinese have to deal with goes on thanks to that “rapid growth” being forced down their throats as factories spring up everywhere and hundreds of thousands of new drivers hit the roads every year.

If they were left alone to grow at a more reasonable pace under a true banner of capitalism, they would have the time to face each problem before it turned into a pandemic.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Supermodel Stephanie Seymour "Dimes" Herself With Two Sons in New Photoshoot

I’ve never heard of Stephanie Seymour before this morning. Probably because she’s just one more classless, morally vacant woman trying desperately to make herself meaningful by advertising how hot she is to anyone who will pay attention for however long they will.

That kind of woman is a dime a dozen, and I don’t pay much attention to dimes. Even if they are supermodels like Seymour. Except, of course, when they pose provocatively with their sons.

And when I say “provocatively,” I mean “trashy.”

The supermodel, mother of two, just wrapped up a photoshoot for Harper’s Bazaar, where she’s dressed in lingerie and striking I-want-it-right-now-big-boy poses with two young men, aged 17 and 20… who just happen to be her kids.

Yahoo features one such picture, where Seymour is dressed in a black satin number that barely covers her down-there, which she accentuates by resting her hand on that very specific portion of her anatomy. Her other arm is thrown around her younger son’s shoulder as she gazes breathlessly at him, looking for all the world like she’s begging to be ravaged.

Gross, I know. So is the way his arms are right back around her, one hand fondling her naked waist.

Yup, I said “naked.” That’s because Seymour’s older son right is behind her, unzipping the side of her dress, leaving a whole lot of curves in full-view.

Double gross, right? Even triple!

But possibly even more pathetic is Yahoo’s playful back-and-forth about the photoshoot. It laughs about how “awkward” it is, yet goes on to defend it:

“Here’s the thing: It’s fashion – meant to titillate, provoke, and eroticize – not to be taken seriously. It’s almost creepy of others to point out the ick factor, right?”

So fashion isn’t meant to be taken seriously, even when it smacks of incest or encourages horrendously inappropriate parenting tactics? And eroticization is just a chance for a good laugh, not a smutty exploitation of femininity and sexuality, two ideals that are supposed to mean something more than mere titillation?

And let me get this right… It’s “creepy” to point out how creepy the photoshoot is? Please someone explain that non-sequitur to me!

Oh yeah, and I’ll forget about Stephanie Seymour and her ten-cent price tag by the time I’m done publishing this post.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Yahoo Comments on Olympics: Russians Don’t Smile Because Americans Are Fake

Welcome to the 2014 Olympic sports coverage, which apparently includes America bashing… in America… by Americans.

Yup. National pride abounds here as we compete in Sochi against the rest of the world. But that national pride is directed at anyone who can put America in its proper place, not the other way around. At least when it comes to our internationally-minded press.

I’m looking at Yahoo News right now, particularly at a headline that says “Readers wonder: Why don’t Russians smile?

The little snippet below reads: “Perhaps the question on Yahoo Search should be turned around: Why do Americans smile so much?”

The strong insinuation is that there can’t possibly be anything wrong with the Russians. It has to be Americans who are weird. Duh.

Click into the article itself, and that insinuation becomes even more blatant:

“Readers weighed in on the question posed earlier, Why don’t Russians smile? Historians note that not smiling was definitely a cultural trait reinforced during the early Soviet era. Unlike the bourgeois Americans, a Russian smile – when finally delivered – would be sincere and honest.”

Say what?!

So Americans are fake, Russians are sincere, and the socialist Soviet Union taught Russians the value of honesty? Are you for real, Yahoo writer?

Maybe Russians don’t smile very often because they’re not happy. Or maybe they don’t smile because they’re cold. Or maybe they don’t smile because they live in a socialist-leaning country that breaks their spirits and crushes their dreams.

And sure, maybe some Americans are fake – *cough* *cough* Obama – but I’d still rather take fake American pleasantries over “honest” Russians crowing happily over American failures in the Olympics.

Apparently, sportsmanship and emotional maturity are about as uncommon as smiles over there.

But hey, at least they're honest! Clearly, we could learn a thing or two from their example.

Monday, February 10, 2014

Kelly M. Flanagan Lays Out Makeup and Womanhood to His Four-Year-Old Daughter

Usually, I come across stuff that irritates me or confounds me so much that I have to write about it. Today, however, I’ve come across an article so beautiful that I have to share it.

It’s by Kelly M. Flanagan, and it’s entitled “Words From a Father to His Daughter (From the Makeup Aisle).” It’s composed for a four-year-old girl, but it’s something that any woman of any age needs to know.

So without further ado, here goes:

Dear Little One,

As I write this, I'm sitting in the makeup aisle of our local Target store. A friend recently texted me from a different makeup aisle and told me it felt like one of the most oppressive places in the world. I wanted to find out what he meant. And now that I'm sitting here, I'm beginning to agree with him. Words have power, and the words on display in this aisle have a deep power. Words and phrases like:

Affordably gorgeous,
Infallible,
Flawless finish,
Brilliant strength,
Liquid power,
Go nude,
Age-defying,
Instant age rewind,
Choose your dream,
Nearly naked, and
Natural beauty.

When you have a daughter, you start to realize she's just as strong as everyone else in the house -- a force to be reckoned with, a soul on fire with the same life and gifts and passions as any man. But sitting in this store aisle, you also begin to realize most people won't see her that way. They'll see her as a pretty face and a body to enjoy. And they'll tell her she has to look a certain way to have any worth or influence.

But words do have power and maybe, just maybe, the words of a father can begin to compete with the words of the world. Maybe a father's words can deliver his daughter through this gauntlet of institutionalized shame and into a deep, unshakeable sense of her own worthiness and beauty.

A father's words aren't different words, but they are words with a radically different meaning:

Brilliant strength. May your strength be not in your fingernails but in your heart. May you discern in your center who you are, and then may you fearfully but tenaciously live it out in the world.

Choose your dream. But not from a department store shelf. Find the still-quiet place within you. A real dream has been planted there. Discover what you want to do in the world. And when you have chosen, may you faithfully pursue it, with integrity and with hope.

Naked. The world wants you to take your clothes off. Please keep them on. But take your gloves off. Pull no punches. Say what is in your heart. Be vulnerable. Embrace risk. Love a world that barely knows what it means to love itself. Do so nakedly. Openly. With abandon.

Infallible. May you be constantly, infallibly aware that infallibility doesn't exist. It's an illusion created by people interested in your wallet. If you choose to seek perfection, may it be in an infallible grace -- for yourself, and for everyone around you.

Age-defying. Your skin will wrinkle and your youth will fade, but your soul is ageless. It will always know how to play and how to enjoy and how to revel in this one-chance life. May you always defiantly resist the aging of your spirit.

Flawless finish. Your finish has nothing to do with how your face looks today and everything to do with how your life looks on your last day. May your years be a preparation for that day. May you be aged by grace, may you grow in wisdom and may your love become big enough to embrace all people. May your flawless finish be a peaceful embrace of the end and the unknown that follows, and may it thus be a gift to everyone who cherishes you.

Little One, you love everything pink and frilly and I will surely understand if someday makeup is important to you. But I pray three words will remain more important to you -- the last three words you say every night, when I ask the question: "Where are you the most beautiful?" Three words so bright no concealer can cover them.

Where are you the most beautiful?

On the inside.

From my heart to yours,

Daddy

Friday, February 7, 2014

Joe Biden Says There's No Good Reason Why He Shouldn't Run for President

CNN asked Vice President Joe Biden whether he would be running for President in the 2016 elections.

“There may be reasons I don’t run,” he answered. “But there’s no obvious reason for me why I think should not run.”

No? Not obvious reasons, Joe?

How about the fact that you’re one of the most incompetent morons to ever take the political stage?

What about the way you handled yourself at the vice presidential debates against Paul Ryan in 2012, where you proved just how little likable character you really have?

And then there’s the issue of your non-existent morality, when you do your best (which admittedly isn’t all that great) to defend a President who has no regard for anyone but himself. That’s not an obvious enough reason for you not to run?

Bottom line, Joe: You’re a national embarrassment as a vice president… so much so that even liberals recognize how pathetic you are.

The only way you’re going to have a successful presidential campaign is if hell freezes over.

Though, admittedly, if Al Gore and his ilk don’t shut up soon, that very well might happen.

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Socialism Is Screwing Up the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi

Remember my comments about Pope Francis and socialism yesterday?


“We live in a backwards world.

“The latest examples of such include Pope Francis, who once again took to railing against the evils of capitalism during a Tuesday address. ‘When power, luxury and money become idols, they take priority over the need for a fair distribution of wealth,’  he intoned.

“Notice that he didn’t say those pursuits get in the way of pursuing God. Whether he wants to admit it or not, he instead complained that they get in the way of playing God.

“And make no mistake: That is what redistribution of wealth is. It is playing God. It is stealing one person’s property to enrich another. It is declaring who has value and who doesn’t. It is determining who deserves and who doesn’t based on authoritarian whims and prejudices. It is claiming a god-size portion of wisdom to deal with an enormously complex issue that no one in the history of the world has been able to solve, and not for lack of trying.”

I only forgot to mention that redistribution of wealth is also a great way to screw up the Olympics.

The 2014 Winter Olympics are being held in Sochi, Russia, which is apparently not really all that ready for the festivities.

Reporters from big broadcasting names across the global news board are finding that their hotel rooms are in shambles. If they’re available at all. Curtain rods are only half-fixed to the walls, heating and internet aren’t available, elevators are broken after half a day of use, water is either unavailable or unusable… The list goes on.

Though reporter Kevin Bishop did find a headshot of Russian “President” Vladimir Putin at the front desk. He snapped a picture and tweeted: “The reception of our hotel in #Sochi has no floor. But it does have this welcoming picture.”

I blame all this on socialism because Russia, the former U.S.S.R. (i.e. Union of Soviet SOCIALIST Republics), never really embraced capitalism. It’s still run by dictatorial types who bar people from free speech and demand eternal gratitude for the heavy hand they use to rule the country.

That doesn’t lend well to business growth – and hotels are businesses, just for the record – since business growth is dependent on entrepreneurial spirits, which are dependent in turn on independence of thought.

Duh, Russia. And duh, Pope Francis as well.

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Pope Francis and Sonia Sotomayor Help Lead a Backwards World

I feel ineloquently repetitive at this point for saying what I’m about to say, but I’m going to say it anyway…

We live in a backwards world.

The latest examples of such include Pope Francis, who once again took to railing against the evils of capitalism during a Tuesday address. “When power, luxury and money become idols, they take priority over the need for a fair distribution of wealth,” he intoned.

Notice that he didn’t say those pursuits get in the way of pursuing God. Whether he wants to admit it or not, he instead complained that they get in the way of playing God.

And make no mistake: That is what redistribution of wealth is. It is playing God. It is stealing one person’s property to enrich another. It is declaring who has value and who doesn’t. It is determining who deserves and who doesn’t based on authoritarian whims and prejudices. It is claiming a god-size portion of wisdom to deal with an enormously complex issue that no one in the history of the world has been able to solve, and not for lack of trying.

Then there’s Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor, who was asked on Monday why she chooses to use the term, “undocumented immigrants” instead of illegal aliens.

Her response was that the issue isn’t one of broken laws but of regulatory issues, adding that depicting such victims of government ineptitude as criminals is insulting. “I think people then paint those individuals as something less than worthy human beings, and it changes the conversation.”

From what? The truth? Reality? National security?

Perhaps we should then stop calling spray paint-wielding brats “vandals” and start calling them artists. Because it’s not their fault the government doesn’t properly recognize their need to express themselves.

Or how about we stop giving negative labels to litterers, who only chuck their McDonald’s wrappers out the window because authorities don’t provide them with enough trash receptacles along their merry way.

With that kind of logic, it makes perfect sense that young women would demand an end to chauvinism by filming a feminist porno at Columbia University’s Butler Library.

In this backwards world we live in, that makes perfect sense.

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

We Can’t Be Bothered to Care How Government Is Ruining Us

If the state of the economy isn’t enough of an indication, here’s further proof that our government just doesn’t care one bit about us…

·         According to National Journal, members of Congress and their aides took 1,887 free trips last year at a combined cost of almost $6 million.
·         The IRS is doling out millions of dollars in bonuses to employees in an effort to boost morale.
·         The National Institute of Health has already spent millions studying male sex workers in Peru. This included a $400,000 grant to figure out why gay men get syphilis. No joke.

Clearly, our government doesn’t take us seriously. Then again, why should it when we’re content to be so incredibly stupid?

I mean, we keep voting them in regardless of what they do to us for their benefit or for themselves at our expense. We’re much more focused on enjoying our lackluster present than defending any kind of worthwhile future.

Media analyst Mark Dice has a new video out of how willing Americans, particularly in California, are to throw their rights away. He’s done this before, taking some utterly absurd petition to the streets and getting people to sign it.

The point is to show how dumb Americans are, when we’re willing to “repeal the Second Amendment,” “disarm the citizens,” “trust the government to be the only one with guns” and even approve “terminating and executing all of the gun owners.”

But I don’t think it’s always so much about Americans being dumb. I think sometimes we’re just too lazy to care that our government is robbing us blind while patting us on the head and telling us it’s for our own good.

In order to pay attention to all of the rotten things our government is doing to us, we would have to take time away from our video games and TV shows, our social lives and narcissistic, short-minded goals.

And clearly, we can’t be bothered.