Monday, January 26, 2015

America Is Politically Broke Because It’s Morally Broke

So why is America broke from a political standpoint?

Well, maybe it’s because we’re broke from a moral standpoint. Let me explain…

The National Institute of Health (NIH) branch of the U.S. federal government recently awarded a $432,000 grant to Columbia University… to study homosexual hookup apps.

I’m not saying anything for or against homosexuality in this blog post. Honestly, I’d be just as disgusted if the NIH spent $432,000 studying heterosexual hookup apps. It’s a ridiculous waste of money regardless of who’s hooking up (i.e. having unsafe sex) with whom.

“But it’s only $432,000,” you might say. “Compared to the larger federal budget, federal intake through taxes, and federal debt, that’s absolutely nothing.”

That’s true. And yet not true at all.

It’s true that a few hundred thousand bucks for a dumb little side project means very little when we’re talking about a few trillion in annual expenditures. I’ll grant you that much.

Yet that’s all I’m granting you considering how that “few hundred thousand bucks for a dumb little side project” has to be added on top of a few hundred thousand bucks for a few thousand other dumb little side projects. Which adds up. Big time.

Moreover, our politicians have no business spending even a penny of taxpayer money on studying our sexual habits. It’s none of their business to begin with! The little pervs need to get out of our bedrooms already.

And before you start thinking my claim that the U.S. is morally broke is because our government creeps on our sex lives, let me also take serious objection to the IRS’s $4.5 million IT contract with the incompetent CGI Federal: the company that botched up, the Obamacare website that crashed over and over and over again, and allowed hackers to access applicants’ entire identities.

Why is the federal government hiring them again?

Probably because it thinks it’s supreme. Like God, it can control everything. It’s a giant ego-case that expects us to bow down and worship it for how well it takes care of us poor, ignorant sods.

“Thank you, federal government. Thank you!!!!” We’re supposed to cry, clutching at its feet and weeping in sheer joy at its benevolence.

That’s why it’s morally broke: Because it’s immoral to adopt that much power to begin with, not to mention plain stupid… as evidenced by our counterproductive amounts of national debt.

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