Monday, May 18, 2015

Are Baltimore Pedestrians Begging to Be Run Over?

I nearly ran a pedestrian over this morning on my commute into Baltimore city this morning. And it would have served her right if I had.

I was coming around a curve in the furthest right-hand lane of three, when I noticed this woman standing out in the middle of it, about two feet away from the sidewalk, staring down at her smartphone.

Startled and concerned with hitting her, I came to a dead halt. But even then, with a vehicle of potential death just a few yards away from her, it still took her a few seconds to look up. And when she did, she gave me one of the most blank-faced stares I have ever seen.

After that pause, she backed up three steps so that she was now a foot and a half out into the road instead of two full feet, thereby still blocking my right of way.

Then she went right back to her phone.

With that kind of disregard for reality, I have to wonder how this woman is still alive. I mean, seriously. She should be a chalk outline on the pavement, right alongside so many other idiot Baltimore city pedestrians I’ve almost run over because they thought they owned the road.

Now, my sister up in central Pennsylvania says I’m being too hard on Baltimore, since she sees pedestrians behaving badly all the time. So apparently it’s a regional issue, if not a national one. Which means this little Pittsburgh Steelers fan can’t blame it on the Baltimore Ravens like she wants to.


Actually, double drat, since this means a much larger area is infected with the delusion of invincibility, which is a sign of extreme arrogance. Which goes hand in hand with a whole slew of other problems.

Problems like running from the police and then doing yourself bodily harm in order to get them back when they catch you… or throwing rocks at cops because they’re trying to keep the peace… or prosecuting innocent men and women to save face and assuage a mob.

Freddie Gray learned his lesson the hard way. Let’s just hope these idiot pedestrians smarten up before they’re dead too, run over by some poor driver just trying to make her way to work.

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