Thursday, May 5, 2016

66-Year-Old Bruce "Caitlyn" Jenner Is Posing Naked for Sports Illustrated

Apparently, Bruce “Caitlyn” Jenner is going to be featured on an upcoming Sports Illustrated cover wearing an American flag and his Olympic medal. And nothing else.

I’d say “Ew” except that I’m not grossed out. If anything, I’m bored.

Why in the world does everyone and their 66-year-old transsexual father think it’s a great idea to pose naked these days? Who bloody cares?

No, seriously: Who honestly cares?

It’s becoming ridiculously common how often we’re exposed (pun intended) to naked people these days, particularly celebrities or celebrity wanna-bes.

You’re pregnant and a celebrity? Pose naked.

You’re no longer a minor and a celebrity? Pose naked.

You’re totally self-consumed, desperate for attention and a celebrity? Pose naked.

Once upon a time, posing naked for the public eye used to make a statement. It used to say, “I’m bold. Daring. Independent of societal expectations of decency. You can take your cultural norms and stick ‘em somewhere highly uncomfortable!”

It used to say, “I’m a stupid slut and I’m proud of it.”

That was twenty years ago though. How times have changed.

Now, it says, “I’m still a stupid slut but it’s because I can’t come to my own conclusions and all the other stupid sluts tell me this is how to show I’m proud of being a stupid slut so I might as well pose naked and hopefully people will like it and think I’m sexy and bold and daring even though I only feel that way when people tell me I look that way because I’m really too insecure to make up my own mind about who I am and how I feel and what I think.”

Which, incidentally, is a lot more pathetic than those pioneers of nudity back in the day.

The truth is that being naked is so passé at this point that Playboy can’t even make money off of it anymore.

That says something.

Why Sports Illustrated and Bruce “Caitlin” Jenner haven’t gotten the memo yet is beyond me. If they really want to make a statement these days, they should try keeping their clothes on.

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